ask a sub

Sex therapist and author Yana Tallon-Hicks dropped by to share some practical sex advice, thoughts on neurodivergence and kink, and lay down some beautiful reflections on consent-forward parenting.

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Introducing my campaign slogan — let’s get a fire under every would-be Dom’s butt! You can’t light the fire, but you can toss some kindling on the sucker and warm yourself by its flame. Maybe roast a…

Communication is hard! Ever wanted to do it non-verbally with your butt? Enter: the hanky code. Today we’re talking about its origins in queer cruising culture and discussing how to plan your Hot Han…

Erica Smith helps Purity Culture dropouts rebuild their sexual ethic after escaping restrictive religions, and this week she’s helping all of us deal with the cult of America. On the way we talk abou…

A listener calls in wondering how in god’s name to deal with having a CRUSH on a CIS MAN?!? (Valid). Lina gives an answer about trusting your body and not letting weird Christian plagiarists from the…

This week we’ve got a HUGE announcement and a call from a sub who sounds frickin’ exhausted. Who isn’t?? Lina reminds everybody about how submission begins at home, and how the call of self-discovery…

Lina shares a million thoughts on anal sex from a sub’s perspective including sweet meditations on the butt’s position as a metaphor for the liminal space between our conscious and subconscious minds…

A sub in an M/s dynamic calls in wondering how to integrate more long distance service into their dynamic and Lina nerds out on protocol in great detail. A brain dump if you will. (I’m NOT going to m…

Calling all rubber buggy baby kinksters… let’s take a hard 180 away from the doomscroll and talk about the surprising history of the latex kink. From fashion runways to kiddie pools of piss, this ver…

A listener calls in feeling big feelings about a new Dom, and Lina talks about making the most of the safe havens we find along the road to our dream situation. And maybe covering those safe havens i…

Hey!! Hey you!! Stop worrying about upsetting people with your very reasonable needs and requests! In today’s episode, a caller worries that their Dom is upset by their needs/wants/suggestions, and L…

No family?! Community kitchens?! Mandatory orgies?! Less social isolation?! This is the future the left wants, and Lina is forcing it down your throat this week alongside brilliant guest Sophie Lewis…

This Christmas, fear isn’t just for the ballot box. That’s right, a caller wants to know how to negotiate with fear around kinks, edges, and, the scariest monster of all, the terrifying ordeal of bei…

A caller wants to know if straight people are ruining kink, and Lina gets into the history of gentrification in the kink world and how well-meaning straights can use their kink for good. Also a diatr…

Ever wondered how to drop the news of some of your less mainstream kinks in a relationship? You know… the really head-turning ones that would shock polite company? The ones that keep you up at night …

Gather ‘round to hear the debauched tales of connection, mutual support, and hot sex contained in the ever problematic social media boogeyman… the Age Gap Relationship!! These crowdsourced stories co…

Looootttttaaaaaa feelings about gender this week, huh folks? We’re discussing the “gender wars,” how you can assist in the political apocalypse, and how to embrace one’s identity as a male submissive…

Come one, come all, to the wholesome dumpster we raccoons cluster in also known as the Ask A Sub discord community. The community is a benefit of patreon and the reason it’s so many people’s favorite…

A caller wants to know how to use their kinky toolkit to address a recently resurfaced memory of past trauma, and Lina gets into how kink, while not a panacea, can be supportive as we transform trigg…

C'mon guys, a tale as old as time. We’ve all been there - your Dom is seeing other subs, and your jealousy and the Social Media Demon have twisted the situation to be unbearable. How can we break jea…