Your Inner Child Is An Idiot

Voldemort vs. Vedder: whoever wins, we lose. In this episode we ponder the philosophical depths of Powder (1995). 

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This week, we look back on a movie that has the bravery to say, "F*ck it, let's blow up the Mir Space Station."

Thank you to our meteoric Patrons, including Jacob Grimm, Larissa Maestro, Dan McInty…

Remember that meteor movie?!

No. The other one.

Thank you to our meteoric Patrons, including Larissa Maestro, Dan McIntyre, Ghost in the Burbs, Joshua Nicholson, Kristin Carter, Jonathon Day, Kar…

Finally a movie that does what we all wish we could: push the most hated actor in a generation into a fiery cauldron of magma. SEE YOU IN HELL, TOM HANKS.

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Volcano (1997) features rough-hewn, weathered, craggy, stone-faced, stoic, hardened... ....siiiiigh...

You already got the joke, right? We're talking about Tommy Lee Jones.

Thank you to our magma…

Have you ever watched a disaster movie and wished YOU were the intransigent grandmother in the boiling lake of acid? This week, Dante’s Peak!

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"IT'S A STIMPEED!"

Thank you to our feral Patrons, including Larissa Maestro, Dan McIntyre, Ghost in the Burbs, Joshua Nicholson, Kristin Carter, Jonathon Day and Karen Curd. If you'd like to get t…

What if Hot Topic was a movie? This week, The Nightmare Before Christmas! 

Thank you to our ghoulish Patrons, including Larissa Maestro, Dan McIntyre, Ghost in the Burbs, Joshua Nicholson, Kristin …

This holiday season, it’s important to remember the true meaning of Christmas: letting a man die of a spinal injury in the snow after you steal his clothes and transportation.

Thank you to our rosy…

The closest thing to a Thanksgiving movie we could find was Addams Family Values, a movie about a Halloween-y family going to summer camp.

Thank you to our ghoulish Patrons, including Larissa Maest…

In 1988, Nintendo released a game that finally let you play as Mario, Luigi, Toa...

Look, let’s not play around here. You played as the Princess from 1-1 to 7-2. You can’t lie to us.

Thank you to…

Two servants stop a rapist cult leader scientist who is holding two innocent people hostage in a dank castle AND THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE BAD GUYS. This week: The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Thank…

A story of a pig who wanted to be a sheepdog and a man *chokes* a man who *sobs audibly*

That'll do Patrons, including Larissa Maestro, Dan McIntyre, Ghost in the Burbs, Joshua Nicholson and Jonath…

Join Damon and DJ as they explore the strange, shoulder pad-dominated world of the 80s. How very.

Thank you to our Patrons, including Larissa Maestro, Dan McIntyre, Ghost in the Burbs, Joshua Nicho…

Physically unappealing characters plod through a washed-out apocalyptic wasteland in The Land Before Time, the movie that you watched at numerous sleepovers at that one really religious friend's hous…

Today, DJ and Damon bravely debate where exactly the Danger Zone lies. Modern day Iraq? The Fertile Crescent? Or (as one religion posits) Jackson County, Missouri?

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You ever see Michael Madsen sleepwalk? You want to? This week: Free Willy!

Thank you to our Patrons, including Larissa Maestro, Dan McIntyre, Ghost in the Burbs, Joshua Nicholson and Jonathan Day f…

You can mock it, but this movie did a lot to raise awareness of facial removal surgery. This week: Face/Off!

Thank you to our Patrons, including Larissa Maestro, Dan McIntyre, Ghost in the Burbs, A…

Y'know that feeling in a horror movie when she goes upstairs and you yell, "No! He's up there!!!"? Well, replace "goes upstairs" with "trusts white colonists" and replace "He's up there" with "He's g…

Sometimes -- and I think we all know this -- you just need a hotshot lawyer with a DUI who hates kids to turn your rag-tag peewee hockey team around. Damon and DJ watch The Mighty Ducks.

Thank you …