Playing With Fire

Individuation, enmeshment, symbiosis, co-dependence, individualism, interdependence… how on Earth can we navigate through all these paradigms and bring balance to our relationships??

Luckily, in this…

Jessica will be back next week with her coauthor David Cooley. Prime the pump by listening to this episode!

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It's normal to want your relationship to feel secure.

It's normal to want to individuate.

Communication, transitions, new relationship energy, oh my! Being a hinge partner between multiple consensually non-monogamous relationships can be so overwhelming. Don’t worry—in this second episode…

Feeling more like a doorstop than a hinge? We’ve been there. If you are the pivot point between multiple partners in a polyamorous relationship, you already know that it can be a challenging role to …

Starting a new relationship, ending a relationship, negotiating within a partnership for the first time, practicing differentiation, having kids - all of these changes can be positive, exciting, and …

When one person in a monogamous relationship announces to their partner that they are polyamorous, it can be shocking, and it can bring up a lot of feelings. Some people call this “polybombing” - may…

Veto power: What is it? What are the pros of cons of using it in polyamorous relationships? Could the desire to exercise it be a relic from your monomind?

Spoiler alert: we aren’t fans of veto power.…

‘Agreements’ and ’consequences’ can feel like big scary words, but they are not the same things and ‘rules’ and ‘punishments.’ In fact, when you put these frameworks into practice, they can actually …

Relationship “work” doesn’t have to feel like work! With some re-framing and a playful attitude, the work can feel a lot more like play!

What does it mean to ‘do the work’ in your relationship? This …

If you’ve had a partner bring up the possibility of non-monogamy, and your reaction was - ‘why am I not enough?’ - you’re not alone. We dive into why this feeling comes up so often for people who are…

Conversations about de-escalation can stir up a lot of fear—change freaks us out!—but things are always changing in our relationships, especially when we’re exploring non-monogamy and untangling ours…

What if you didn’t have to cut yourself off from your own toxic attractions? Sounds ridiculous, right? I MUST have to go cold turkey on my romanticization of a**hole behavior. But what if exploring t…

Conflict happens. Especially when differentiation and individuation are parts of your personal and relational journeys. And that’s a good thing!

Enter Imago Dialogue, a communication tool created by …

You can be fully immersed in polyamory, living and breathing the non-monogamous lifestyle, and still be stuck in a monogamous mindset. If you feel split, conflicted, like you’re living in bifurcated …

Have you ever felt like you’re caught in a mix of jealousy and compersion? Like you want to be happy for your partner, but there’s also this feeling of jealousy tugging at you? You are so not alone. …

If you’re at the beginning of your non-monogamy journey, or if you’re feeling a little stuck and you don’t know where to turn for community, this episode is for you. We’re joined by Emma and Fin from…

Struggling with your own jealousy? 

Partner struggling with jealousy?

Friends/community arguing about how to handle jealousy?

This episode was MADE for you.

The jealousy roadmap emerged directly fr…

How does it go for you to show up with all your unique you-ness? Of course some of you is private, but it can be tricky to bring the rest of you out into your relationships. We talk with distinguishe…

There are things you can do to build intimacy in your relationships, and things you can do that can break it down. We're talking about wording agreements and commitments in ways that avoid leaving ba…

Do the limited choices on the mainstream relationship menu leave you feeling restless and looking for something else? Do you think something more customized would suit you and your partners or partne…