No Return
No Return: An Audio Drama by Kier Zhou
Enjoy yourself in the chaotic, fantastical world of "No Return," where the worldbuilding ambition rivals Robert Jordan, the humour channels Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams, and the violence echoes Tom Sharpe—all wrapped in the indie punk aesthetic of a one man band making content on a laptop powered by a potato.
This full cast comedy fantasy spans a diverse array of tales:
- Clumsy Divine Quests: Join researchers on accidental divine missions.
- Mercenary Chaos: Witness comedic clashes between mercenaries and foreign warships.
- Eerie Mysteries: Delve into the haunting search for lost children.
- Ancient Secrets: Unearth treacherous truths in the Darklands.
- Sinister Plots: Navigate a city's dark underbelly filled with kidnappings and dark schemes.
- Ensemble Comedy of Errors: Dive into epic fantasy battles where magic and mayhem reign supreme.
- Actual Play: Follow the gripping saga of a burning city and the heroes fighting for its survival amidst chaos and intrigue. Told through a tightly edited TTRPG actual play.
And remember, for those seeking extra tales and behind-the-scenes magic, check out:
https://patreon.com/NoReturnAD
- Update frequency
- every day
- Average duration
- 28 minutes
- Episodes
- 107
- Years Active
- 2022 - 2025
13: Actual Play: Fate of Daya: We All Died For Daya!
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
They have faced a feinting force. They have faced insurgents in the city. They have faced the mysterious mac…
12: Actual Play: Fate of Daya: Everything Is Totally Normal!
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Jorvin rations the city and bestows Swifty with a new title. Swifty puts Delicate Hammer through 'the trials…
11: Actual Play: Fate of Daya: The Clothes Maketh The Man..
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Vita is dead... the city is still under attack... what will our heroes do?
Want to learn more about Vash and …
10: Actual Play: Fate of Daya: You Wouldn't Believe Me, Even If I Told You...
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Can Alaric talk his way out of this one?
Want to learn more about Vash and the NoReturniverse? Why not check …
9: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: I Am Quite Concussed!
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Jorvin and Swifty investigate Alaric. The Party reunites to see Vita.
Want to learn more about Vash and the N…
8: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: What Manner Of Gobsh**e Is This!?
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
The battle for the streets ends...the battle for the city begins.
Want to learn more about Vash and the NoRet…
Call to Arms! Kingdom of Lern Pilot.
Hey everyone!
We are super excited to announce the release of the pilot episodes of The Kingdom of Lern over the next few weeks!
We would REEEEALLY appreciate your feedback on this story…
7: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: Keep That Blade Sharp, Yeah.
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Salryn rises to the occasion!
Want to learn more about Vash and the NoReturniverse? Why not check out The Lo…
6: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: If You Have To Step Up, You Step Up
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Will Salryn rise to the occasion?
Want to learn more about Vash and the NoReturniverse? Why not check out The…
5: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: I Require It, Nonetheless
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
An assassin in the warehouse, a mysterious character under the temple, and a useless commander of the guard…
4: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: "What Do We Do?"
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
The city burns, the farms burn and the enemy army is marching towards them… what will our heroes do?
Want to…
3: Actual: Play: The Fate of Daya: The Battle of Nuur
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
Our heroes thought the war was over…but the battle has come to familiar shores.
Want to learn more about Vas…
2: The Fate of Daya: The Adventurers and The City
Episode Art by Jim Tuohy
Jim Tuohy Art
Gamesmaster provided by Hearthfire Tales
All seems well in Daya and the war is finally going the right way! Daya’s Army and it’s allies are marching…
1: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: What is an Actual Play?
Hey all!
We, here at No Return, are returning to our roots!
As some of you may know, Erset La Tari; The Land of No Return, began life as a 'homebrew' Table Top Role Playing Game (TTRPG)…
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Yep.... yep... definitely in need of repairs...
Originally published 26 Feb 2024
Samael Vine: Kier Zhou
Niillas Janicek: Dylan Smith
Selwyn Janicek: Stasi Dimitrova ig
Paela: Dragonbait
Matko…
Bonus Content: The Bards of Sada Emedu
It's not all doom, gloom and adventure in Erset La Tari- especially not in the Emeduan capitol.
Sit down, listen and enjoy a little low stakes comedy-drama from the Bards of Sada Emedu.
L…
5: Anderkant : It Was The Leps!
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!
Patreon
Min runs for his life to escape the darkland creatures- only to begin running o…
4: Anderkant: I Can Carry It!
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!
Patreon
Sounds of movement in the dark spook our trapped pioneers. The Lessee's sister …
3: Anderkant: I Said Don’t! Interrupt!
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!
Patreon
The Lessee shows his true colours and the Specialist pays the price. Min and 'H…
2: Anderkant: Please, Call Me 'H'
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!
Pahttps://patreon.com/NoReturnADtreon
Trapped and alone in the Darklands, Min considers…