Why Does My Partner

In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca answer a listener who asks the following question: “Recently, when my partner and I have been having conflict, I try to come from a place of curiosity, talk…

In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca answer listener question: “Why does my partner set me up to react when he makes controversial statements that are hurtful or mis-representational and expect…

Does it seem like your partner gets defensive and/or hurt most times when you disagree? Have you ever wondered what could be behind that feeling for them and how to create a space where you are still…

Have you or your partner ever wondered how about opening your relationship? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca cover not only some of the many reasons partners might explore non-monogamy, how…

How can you connect while communicating to your partner when they say things that they know (or may not know) will hurt you? Are they trying to be mean and malicious? Are they just trying to get your…

Does your partner ever act like their mother or father? (Hint: we all do it sometimes.) In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca dive deep into this question and discover some truths that will make…

Does your partner ever make assumptions about you that are more aligned with their mother or father than they are with you? Or do they react to you sometimes the way they would to their parent? In th…

When we do something “for our partner”...why are we doing it? Are we really doing it for them, or are we doing it for ourselves? Do you end up blaming your partner and calling them “ungrateful”, etc?…

Feeling worthless is always an awful experience no matter where the feeling originated, and it’s never okay to try to make someone else feel worthless. But are your partner’s actions causing you to f…

Why does my partner say they are focusing on "their stuff" but it doesn't seem like they are from the outside? Why do they point the finger back at us and tell us to just focus on our own “stuff”? In…

We all want to avoid grief, but how do you handle it when your partner doesn’t meet your expectations? Do you silently resent them? Do you take the chance of making a request? Or do you grieve and ac…

What is it that sucks us into the ex-partner dynamic? Is it a need to be “right”? A fear of being vulnerable? Or repeating old patterns from your childhood because that’s where you are most comfortab…

After money, sex, kids, time and cleaning, in-laws are another topic couples most commonly fight about. “Why do you talk to your mother more than you talk to me? Your mom is in the middle of our rela…

“Why doesn't my partner validate what I'm feeling when I'm upset?”  The short answer is, because it’s really hard to do. Oftentimes in the moment, one or both of us is too upset to make a responsive …

This week, a listener asks, “Why does my partner hate every way that I am different from them?”  Difference is what makes us human, and how we respond to difference is such an integral part of the hu…

Relationships can be hard, even healthy ones.  They take work.  So, what does it mean when one partner doesn’t want to work on the relationship and the other does? Is it a sign that they care less th…

When we think of the concept of cheating, typically a sexual affair comes to mind.  But that is only one form of cheating out of a myriad of ways.  Ultimately, cheating is a betrayal, a breach of agr…

We all have had the experience of being corrected by someone else.  Often, it doesn’t feel so great.  It can make us wonder what’s inherently wrong with us or why they can’t just let us own our thoug…

Last week, in this miniseries on shutdowns, we talked about shutting down in the middle of an argument. This week, we’re talking about shutting down from a slightly different angle: When one of us in…