Untoxicated Podcast
Sheri and Matt Salis just wanted a normal life – normal marriage, normal careers, a normal house and happy kids. Instead, they lived a life of lies and terror as they struggled with Matt’s alcoholism. While their experience sounds rare, with over 15 millions problem drinkers in America, their alcoholic marriage was all too normal.
Matt has been writing about their experiences in alcoholism and recovery for years. On the Untoxicated Podcast, Sheri and Matt talk about it, too.
No subjects are off limits as the couple discusses the trauma of active addiction, the pain of early recovery, the destruction and rebuilding of trust, and the impact on their intimate relationship. If you love an alcoholic, the disease will terrorize your relationship. We hope you’ll listen and find healing in our shared stories.
For more support from Sheri and Matt, check out their Echoes of Recovery program providing connection and healing for the loved ones of alcoholics.
- Update frequency
- every 5 days
- Average duration
- 59 minutes
- Episodes
- 324
- Years Active
- 2020 - 2025
Ep133 – Sheri’s Return to Open-Minded Listening
During his active addiction and early sobriety, Matt never had an idea that Sheri was interested in hearing about. Whether it was his arrogance, his gaslighting or his mistakes, new ideas just meant …
00:43:10 |
Mon 04 Apr 2022
Ep132 – What are YOUR Needs?
If you are the loved one of an alcoholic, it may be hard to be truthful and authentic with your partner who is dealing with or recovering from addiction. You're vulnerability has probably been used a…
01:00:24 |
Mon 28 Mar 2022
Ep131 – The Differences between Boundaries and Ultimatums
"You do what I tell you or else," statements rarely work, and they create additional friction while weakening our relative positions in relationships. In this episode, Sheri and Matt share their pers…
00:59:22 |
Mon 21 Mar 2022
Ep130 – Disastrous Communication in the Aftermath of Addiction
More than anything else, recovering a relationship from alcoholism is a huge communication problem. And it isn't just a problem with the words we choose, it is the modes of communication that keep us…
01:00:38 |
Mon 14 Mar 2022
Ep129 – Regret is where the Shame Lives
For alcoholics, there is a direct relationship between the shame from past behaviors, and a tangible liquid called alcohol. For the loved ones of alcoholics, spouses in particular, the source of sham…
00:52:47 |
Mon 07 Mar 2022
Ep128 – Love Hurts: Pain Inflicted Between Generations
Do you remember a correction, disciplinary action or criticism from years or decades ago that still hurts? We bet the person who delivered those words doesn't remember. Have you ever delivered a mess…
00:50:57 |
Mon 28 Feb 2022
Ep127 – The Power of Speaking Your Truth
There is an enormous relief that comes with shining a light into the dark corners and letting the truth be heard. And it is more than emotional and mental relief - it is vitally important to our phys…
01:10:46 |
Mon 21 Feb 2022
Ep126 – Surviving the Silence with Kate
Active alcohol addiction is not always loud and chaotic. Sometimes, the silence of the person suffering the pain of addiction causes a different kind of trauma. On this episode, Sheri and Matt welcom…
00:54:38 |
Mon 14 Feb 2022
Ep125 – How did Addiction and Sobriety Feel for Sheri?
Experiencing the addiction and early sobriety of a loved one can feel painful, lonely, chaotic, traumatic, isolating and terrorizing for the spouses of alcoholics. On this episode, Matt asks Sheri to…
01:08:41 |
Mon 07 Feb 2022
Ep124 – Conquering the Two Pitfalls of Early Sobriety
The healing that comes for some in the recovery from alcoholism is the result of hard work. We have to want sobriety for ourselves, and not to appease someone else. We also have to want sobriety beca…
00:49:15 |
Mon 31 Jan 2022
Ep123 – The “Hot Mess” of Intimacy in an Alcoholic Relationship
Trust and alcoholism can't coexist. Intimacy is impossible without trust and vulnerability. So, alcoholism and intimacy are mutually exclusive. If you are in an alcoholic relationship, something impo…
01:00:39 |
Mon 24 Jan 2022
Ep122 – The Pain of “Helpful Advice” that Hurts with Dawn
Our family and our friends mean well when they give us advice about our alcoholic marriages. The problem with well-meaning advice from people who have never walked in our shoes is that it often misse…
01:00:57 |
Mon 17 Jan 2022
Ep121 – The Blame Game Keeps Us Stuck
As an active alcoholic, Matt put a lot of the blame for their dysfunctional marriage on Sheri. In early sobriety, he blamed himself for the overwhelming shame he felt. The whole time, Sheri was convi…
00:57:52 |
Mon 10 Jan 2022
Ep120 – Hard-Earned Tears with Kathy
"I look at the face that looks back at me from the mirror, and it's jarring. I look like I've aged ten years in just this last one. But it's more than superficial. The heartbreak that came with my hu…
00:56:38 |
Mon 03 Jan 2022
Ep119 – Beware of the Inevitable Letdown
The week after Christmas offers lots of threats to sobriety and mental health. Family tension, financial strain, an overbooked calendar, and festive expectations all lead to stress and pressure that …
00:34:25 |
Mon 27 Dec 2021
Ep118 – Risks of Making All the Decisions
Sometimes, like in Matt's case, high-functioning alcoholics are also control-freak assholes. Other times, people who abuse alcohol withdraw leaving all the decisions to the spouse or other loved ones…
00:52:11 |
Mon 20 Dec 2021
Ep117 – Society’s Tolerance for Bad Behavior
"You sure did have a good time at the Christmas party, Matt." When he was actively drinking, Matt heard statements like that more than a few times. But they carried no shame, because our society cele…
00:52:48 |
Mon 13 Dec 2021
Ep116 – Healing from the Fatal Scars of Alcoholism with Dusti Shay
Just over a year after her husband took his own life while firmly in the grasp of alcohol addiction, Dusti Shay is ready to tell her story for the benefit of others fighting to survive this dreadful …
01:14:31 |
Mon 06 Dec 2021
Ep115 – Saving Alcoholics and Loved Ones with Christina Veselak
Christina Veselak is a mental health nutritionist, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and a licensed psychotherapist who founded the Academy for Addiction and Mental Health Nutrition, and she …
00:53:53 |
Mon 29 Nov 2021
Ep114 – Thanksgiving Dread, Drinks and Drama
Alcohol plays such a prominent role in the Thanksgiving celebrations in our society that the holiday deserves a conversation all its own. On this episode, Sheri and Matt relive their Thanksgivings du…
00:41:32 |
Mon 22 Nov 2021
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