Cheerful Despair

“Hello tech support. Uh-huh, uh-huh. In your podcast app? OK. Does the thumbnail have two skeletons on it? Uh-huh. Yeah, I’m afraid you’re going to have to listen to it. Yeah, yeah. The whole thing I…

"I tried top [sic] watch [sic] this. It was beyond stupid and not even a little bit funny. Sounded like extreme left wing nonsense and trying to make it sound funny."

This time on Cheerful Despair:

• …

Recorded in early 2019 and aged in an oak MacBook previously used to produce a fine Scottish audiobook. This episode has exquisite bouquets of:

• Time passes, possibly on the way to taking four conse…

Denied their sound engineer and recording studio by an extremely rude global pandemic, David F. Porteous and David Candy bring you the subtle flavours and rich aroma of Cheerful Despair from the stat…

Cheerful Despair takes you back into the warm, slightly moist, folds of its matronly but disturbingly hairy bosom. Other joys we remind you of in this episode:

• The joy of babies - you can't hit the…

Cheerful Despair take you on a journey across time and space to celebrate New Year 2018 from the comfort of August 2019. Wow!

This time on Britain's 37th best comedy podcast*:

• The Brigadoon extended…

I read once about a podcast that vanished without warning. When it suddenly reappeared, almost two years later, everything was fine. No-one had unsubscribed and everyone just kept listening as if not…

David F. Porteous and David Candy (who like Star Wars) have been to the movies with sound engineer David Chisholm (who likes football and girls).

Why not listen to the aftermath? Includes STAR WARS T…

"I don't know how they got into the air ducts, I just want them out. And don't let Jerry screw you around about how he warned us to put the fine mesh otterwire over the vents because otters are skinn…

"I don't care how many Shannon McNamara has, I am not spending five pounds on another fidget spinner! Why not listen to that stupid podcast instead?"

This week:

• We offer our code-breaking services t…

There are only two things that come out of the Cheerful Despair Podcast Studios - steers and episodes of the Cheerful Despair Podcast - and this doesn't look like a steer. Whatever a steer is.

In thi…

Benefiting from many local amenities, this bright and stylish 2-bedroom podcast features tasteful neutral decor and returns for its 15th episode.

This week:

• David F Porteous will never get a massage…

On this week’s action-packed instalment:

• Sign up! - For the Cheerful Despair Academy of Football
• Chow down! - On our secret recipe for beans on toast (The second ingredient will shock you!)
• Hook up!…

“Jean, when you’re over next weekend, can you ask Mark to look at my phone again? Yeah. It’s that thing with the skeletons. Yeah. It’s come back. Okay. Okay. Thanks love. See you on Saturday.”

On thi…

Season two of my favourite podcast comes to an end in typical style with a flurry of racism, and a battery of insults directed at anonymous/famous man Chet Hanks. Join us in wondering what he ever di…

Cheerful Despair, that pod-cast you forgot you subscribed to, returns. It's honestly better just to listen and not make a scene. We'll just leave a small tip and not eat here again.

This time:

• Have …

Welcome to another episode of Cheerful Despair - the podcast about how Star Trek the Next Generation has too many damn nerds. (This is the sound of the internet eating itself).

On this episode:

• An i…

As relentless as the passing of time and the approach of a referendum on the political destiny of this Moderately Good Britain - so arrives another episode of Cheerful Despair, featuring:

• The actual…

With profuse apologies for the failure to keep our promises for weekly uploading - even though we specifically say in this episode that this is a thing which is happening - here is a bumper episode t…

Hurtling straight at your ears like a bullet from a golden gun (which, presumably is either less dangerous or certainly no more dangerous than a bullet from a gun made of another metal) it's the Chee…