030 - Tenaim (Where Moms Break a Plate)

Author: Rabbi LeighAnn
Published: Tue 01 Apr 2025
Episode Link: https://zencastr.com/z/qurWoYGU

You know about breaking the glass, but what about breaking a PLATE?

Welcome to the first LISTENER QUESTION episode of the Your Jewish Wedding Podcast, where I answer Olivia’s question: “I was wondering if you could explain the breaking of the plates by the mothers?”

Yes! There is a Jewish custom where the mothers of the people getting married break a plate to “Seal the deal.”

(Watch a short video of a plate-breaking I facilitated here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1p9wGz9E92s2LajZY8LAPj07MTcblOiJN/view?usp=drive_link)

As with anything to do with Jewish Weddings, there are many explanations for this custom and different ways to do it. It is connected to what was traditionally an engagement agreement called a tenaim. So, obviously, we need to learn about that first.

Show Notes are below.

Don't forget - you can reach me (Rabbi LeighAnn) any time at www.yourohiorabbi.com or everyonesfavoriterabbi.com or rabbileighann.com !

Fill out the contact form there if you'd like to work with me on your wedding. There are SO many options, from Ketubah consulting to ceremony planning. If there's something you have in mind, don't hesitate to ask - I'm here to help!

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Send questions for me to answer on this podcast to:

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Hope to see you next time! Remember - there is ALWAYS more learning to do!

<3 Rabbi LeighAnn

Text of a egalitarian tenaim example:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1a-o-c__kVCmRz2wD-NkOy12NLB324dAAs9YLGxXBOfg/edit?usp=sharing

Traditional explanations of tenaim/breaking a plate:

https://ohr.edu/ask_db/ask_main.php/2632/Q1/

https://judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/49234/why-do-the-mothers-break-the-plate

Pieces of the broken plate as auspicious: