Why Nice Girls Finish Last: The 8 Step Playbook for Women Who Are DONE Being Overlooked | Dr. Thema Bryant PT 1

In this powerful episode of Women of Impact, Lisa Bilyeu welcomes the trailblazing psychologist, author, and current President of the American Psychological Association, Dr. Thema Bryant. Renowned for her expertise in trauma recovery and healing, Dr. Thema joins Lisa to dive into the realities of heartbreak, betrayal, and emotional pain—and, most importantly, how to begin rebuilding your sense of self after it all feels shattered.

Dr. Thema unpacks why recognizing and accepting our pain is the first step toward genuine healing, dismantling the lies we’ve been told about ourselves, and stepping out of shame and denial. From discussing the damaging waiting game for an apology, to offering insights from narrative therapy, she guides listeners to reclaim agency in their lives and shift their internal narratives. If you’ve struggled with toxic hope, anger, or the burden of forgiveness, this episode is packed with essential truths to help you break free.

SHOWNOTES

00:00 What to do when your heart is broken

00:32 The importance of admitting you're hurting

01:32 The danger of denial and how it feeds shame

02:32 Healing and the ripple effect on your relationships

03:11 Surrounding yourself with the right people

03:29 Why waiting for an apology keeps you stuck

04:41 Restorying your life through narrative therapy

05:46 Moving from “why” to “what now”

06:17 Dismantling core negative beliefs

07:11 How to detect the lies you’ve absorbed

08:31 The “hope as handcuffs” trap

09:26 Differentiating between joint and solo hope in relationships

10:45 Recognizing empty words vs. changed behavior

11:47 The double-edged sword of anger and revenge

12:22 Constructive vs. destructive anger

13:49 Breaking the revenge spiral and centering yourself

16:06 Real-world examples of holding on to old wounds

17:05 External messages and body image: it's not all your fault

18:30 Forgiveness redefined: forgetting, speed, and reconciliation

FOLLOW DR. THEMA BRYANT:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.thema/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.thema

Website: https://www.drtaymabryant.com

Podcast: The Homecoming Podcast

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