When We Disagree

Kurt Gray, a psychology professor and the author of Outraged: Why We Fight about Morality and Politics and How to Find Common Ground, discusses leaning into curiosity, asking questions and fostering …

Ben Klutsey, executive director of the Mercatus Center whose work to bridge political differences is showcased in the documentary Undivide Us, shares a formative story of encountering racism as a chi…

Kathryn Joyce, a philosopher and civil discourse director at Ohio State University, recalls a memorable clash with a college professor over unfair tests—an early lesson in the challenges of pushing b…

Jermaine Johnson, a South Carolina state representative and former pro basketball player, shares his frustration with the legislative process, revealing how performative politics often masks real, be…

Lisa Silvestri, a professor at Penn State University, reflects on the deep emotional stakes of political disagreement, describing her post-2024 election disillusionment as a kind of heartbreak rooted…

Martin Carcasson, the director of the Center for Public Deliberation at Colorado State University, shares a debate about the value of, well, debate.  While debate at its best sharpens ideas and expos…

Jancee Dunn, a New York Times columnist and the author of How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids, recalls the explosive arguments that erupted between her and her husband after the birth of their ch…

Michael Covington, an experienced government relations officer, reveals the art of navigating the toughest conflicts with strategic persuasion and direct engagement. With a mix of humor and hard-earn…

Carol Gorelick, a lifelong educator, shares a powerful story of a painful disagreement with a South African colleague that reshaped her understanding of race and societal dynamics. Reflecting on the …

Matt Bares, CEO of Chandler Construction Services, shares the tough decisions he faced during the pandemic. Torn between public safety, personal liberty, and business survival, he mandated COVID vacc…

Kristal Hudson-Randall, a retired IT executive and former educator, shares  an internal struggle about the direction of the nation. A former optimist, she now wonders whether she can really trust her…

In 2018, Phelosha Collaros, a senior leader at St. John's College, faced a social media firestorm after announcing the college president’s upcoming appearance on Tucker Carlson’s show.  The announcem…

David Dudrick, a Catholic philosopher at Colgate University, shared his religious commitments with a colleague only to have his beliefs utterly dismissed. Despite being initially cast as foolish by h…

Jenn Wiggin, an executive producer of TV shows, films, and plays, discusses the shifting dynamics of her 30-year friendship with an actress in New York. After Jenn married and moved away from New Yor…

Clint Eisenhower recounts a career-shifting clash with a retiring CEO, where unspoken fears about aging and relevance turned a professional transition into a personal battle. Despite feeling deceived…

What happens when we shift from "winning" an argument to genuinely seeking common ground?  Bryan Gentry, a strategic communications professional, made what we now calls a reckless post on social medi…

Randall Geddings, a therapist, shares an experience of conflict with a close friend. Rick started hanging out with someone Randall didn't trust.  When Randall expressed his feelings to Rick, their ar…

Rachael McNamara is a health educator. She identifies as a recovering conflict avoider and has worked hard to recast relational tension. Rachael explains how several key conflicts in her life showed …

Barclay Murphy's husband was killed in Afghanistan in 2005. She's been arguing with the federal government about spousal death benefits ever since. 

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Jamelle Bouie is a columnist at the New York Times. The way he argues in public is very different from the way he argues in his private life. 

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