The place we didn´t chose.

At certain times I find myself thinking more intensively about how I held my mother´s hand before she passed away. Her hand was warm. The warmth affected me. The warmth was there even though she slipped away further and further from me. I can still recall it, as if it was yesterday. But she disappeared from me and the next day the hand was cold.

I clung to the feeling of warmth in order not to forget how it felt. It represented how she was as a person; warm, genuine, a lot of integrity and feelings; someone that could hold me and be there for me. But someone I could hold as well and be there for, during years of cancer and other deceases.

Sometimes memories of feeling the warmth of her hand unexpectedly come back to me strongly together with what it symbolizes, and I don´t know what makes it happen.

I am thinking that, if this kind of experience is happening to me, I am sure it does to you who listen as well. Memories of the beloved, the warm, the good, the bright that we hold on to. Or it might also be the intense, unpredictable thing that happened and suddenly brought us to a new place, the place we did not chose but, we had no choice.

Here I talk about examples of what complicated grief can look like, and give you a few thoughts about how to approach it.

Welcome to this episode of The When life gets in the way- how can we find hope again - podcast.

Please follow and share, I think we need to spread knowledge and normalisation of painful life changes and grief.

Thank you for listening!

/Catharina

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