Brian Spitulnik: Therapy, Trauma & Self-Compassion – An Unfiltered Conversation | Ep. 33

What really happens in therapy? And how do we begin to heal from the trauma we don’t even realize we’re carrying?



In Episode 33 of TURTZED, Charlie sits down with Brian Spitulnik, LMSW, a New York City-based therapist, for a candid, unscripted conversation about the realities of therapy, healing from trauma, and the lifelong process of personal growth.

Brian shares his unique journey from Broadway performer to therapist, and the impact of queerness, identity, and grief on his path. Together, they explore the emotional complexities of difficult relationships, the power of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, and why the goodbye between therapist and client can be one of the most meaningful moments in the therapeutic relationship.

This episode blends personal reflection with professional insight—offering a rare, behind-the-scenes look at the emotional layers within therapy.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

You’ll hear an open, grounded conversation about the realities of therapy—from what really happens in a session to how therapists manage their own growth. Brian and Charlie dive into the layered effects of trauma, the connection between anger and unmet needs, and how compassion plays a central role in healing. Whether you’re in therapy, considering it, or just curious about how emotional growth works, this episode brings raw insight and resonance.

Key Takeaways:

Therapy is a Journey, Not a Fix – It’s not about achieving a final goal but learning to stay present with yourself over time.

Trauma Lives in the Body and Relationships – Unresolved pain often shows up in how we connect—or disconnect—from others.

The Therapeutic Relationship is a Mirror – The way we relate to our therapist often reflects our patterns in the outside world.

Internal Family Systems (IFS) Helps Us Meet Our Parts – Understanding our internal “parts” gives us more compassion and clarity.

Anger Points to What Needs Protection – When we listen to our anger, we discover what still hurts.

Self-Compassion is the Core of Growth – The more gently we treat ourselves, the more we create space for transformation.

Looking for more stories on resilience, healing, and identity?

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Connect & Contact

Brian Spitulnik, LMSW: Website | Instagram | TikTok

TURTZED: bio.site/turtzed

Charles Turtz: bio.site/turtzc

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Disclaimer:

The TURTZED Podcast represents the views and opinions of Charles Turtz and his guests. This content is intended for informational, educational, and entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult with a qualified healthcare provider regarding your specific health needs. Read our full disclaimer

Episode Chapters:

00:00 What is therapy?

01:01 The Path to Becoming a Therapist

05:42 Understanding Trauma and Its Impact

11:58 The Ongoing Process of Therapy

15:43 Navigating Difficult Relationships

18:38 Exploring Internal Family Systems Therapy

23:47 The Therapeutic Relationship and Goodbye

27:25 Meta Conversations in Therapy

33:33 Exploring Anger and Its Origins

37:24 Consoling the Inner Child

41:02 Empathy as a Healing Tool

45:24 The Importance of Self-Compassion

49:48 Navigating Personal Growth

51:56 The Complexity of Identity

53:21 The Role of Compassion in Success

56:28 Self-Love