09-17-2024 - On This Day in Insane History

On September 17, 2024 in the village of Lower Sprocketing-on-Mud in the English county of Shropshire, an unusual event occurred that gave the village notoriety across the region. It was a typical morning with thick fog still clinging to the pastures when the villagers began to hear the oddest sound emanating from Wright's farm - a sort of high-pitched mooing coupled with what sounded for all the world like a person singing an aria.

Naturally, the villagers gathered around the farm to investigate and were astonished by what they witnessed emerged from the mist - Mr. Wright's prize-winning bull Horace had broken free from his pen and was prancing about the field on his hind legs, waving his forelegs in the air and belting out what could only be described as a credible rendition of La donna è mobile from Rigoletto. As the sight and sound caused jaws to collectively drop in shock and amazement, little did anyone know they had a fledgling opera star in their midst.

While poor Mr. Wright could only look on in bewilderment and concern for his livestock futures, the sight of brawny Horace balancing on two legs in wooly tights and slipping easily between baritone and tenor brought tears of laughter and mirth to even the most stoic of villagers. By midday, news of the singing shorthorn had spread far and wide, with visitors flocking to Lower Sprocketing-on-Mud and crowding around Wright's farm just hoping for an encore. Whether it was something Horace ate or perhaps a strange delayed side effect of mad cow disease, this was one morning the village of Lower Sprocketing-on-Mud would never forget.