Chapter 18

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“What happened!?” he said.

Psyche inwardly jumped. She must have fallen asleep while she waited. 

She noticed the fire was gone from the hearth.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“What happened to the house?” he said. “This morning you allowed it to be a palace. I thought it looked quite nice.” 

Psyche wondered how she could explain. She’d liked the palace well enough, but it just didn’t feel right.

“It didn’t suit me,” she said.

She couldn’t think of what else to say.

“It didn’t suit you? Why not?” he said, clearly confused. 

He seemed somewhat annoyed as well. 

“I don’t know. I — I “ she said. She felt even more unsure what to say as she tried to figure out why he was annoyed. Why would it matter what the house looked like, especially during the day? 

“Didn’t you like it?” he said. “You were the one who created it, gave it its features and design. I thought you did well.” 

His voice was coming from various parts of the little house. It was as if he was pacing.

“I’m sorry, I — I just couldn’t live in such a luxurious palace. This house suits me best,” she said.

“But why?” he said. His voice seemed to stop moving.

“I — I don’t know,” she said. “This just feels more comfortable.”

“How can this be more comfortable? A firmer bed, a more humble meal? How is that more comfortable?” he asked. 

Psyche felt confused. 

Why was he upset? 

“What’s wrong with a more humble home?” she said, standing. She wasn’t sure what else to do. “Do we really need such luxuries to be happy? Wouldn’t it be just as good to be humble and happy than to be rotting away in so much wealth?” 

“There is nothing wrong with having more and enjoying nicer things,” he said. 

“I just can’t!” Psyche said, failing at finding a more delicate way to say it. “I can’t live in a palace and know that there are people in my world still suffering. I have accepted my fate. But isn’t this my prison? I’m here, unable to help, unable to comfort, unable to do anything useful.”

“Psyche, is this a prison to you?” he said, a touch of pain in his voice.

Immediately sensing his hurt, she softened.

“I’m sorry,” she said, trying to face his voice in the dark. “I don’t mean to be ungrateful or to seem to say I don’t like it here. I just can’t — I can’t live in luxury with the way things are. It doesn’t seem fair. It doesn’t feel right.”

“Psyche,” he said, changing to a more understanding tone himself. “Your comfort and happiness doesn’t take away from the happiness of others. It just makes you more miserable.”

“Simplicity is not misery,” she said. 

“So you’d be completely content eating berries and porridge for the rest of your life?” he said. “You’d be content to be a villager’s wife, toiling and struggling day in and day out? And what would you prove? That you’re not proud? That you’re humble just like the rest of them?”

“A simple life comes with the satisfaction of a job well-done,” she said.

“And you found the villagers perfectly content with their lot in life? They didn’t want for anything? Never complained?” he said, a sense of challenge in his voice.

“Of course, they wished for things to be better,” she said. “They wanted rest from some of their labors. But wealth does not free a person of struggles. Truly no life is spared pain. Everyone experiences loss and disappointment.”

“True,” he said. “Why, though, do you choose to live as a villager, limiting your growth and enjoyment?” 

“Simple things bring me joy,” she said. “I don’t need a wealth of jewels hanging about my neck to feel important. I don’t need to walk about like a queen to have people appreciate my company.” 

“What would you do in the village?” he asked. 

His abrupt change of subject confused her more. Was he setting her up to prove she was already proud?

“I never meant to be worshipped,” she said instinctively. He had to know she hadn’t meant for the people to worship her. 

“I know,” he said. He seemed a bit exasperated. “What did you do in the village? What was your work?” 

“Well,” she said, hesitating. She wasn’t sure what exactly he wanted to know. She decided to start at the beginning. “At first I was fascinated by the tales and stories of the attendants and workers in the palace. I would catch them talking about a pig chase or watch them cry over a lost loved one. I wanted to know more. I wanted to listen to every story. 

“I would hear about trials and triumphs. Sometimes it was idle gossip, but even then I learned so much.”

“You learned from idle gossip?” he said, doubting. “How?” 

Psyche thought for a moment. 

“Early on, before everyone worshiped me, I remember one of the young attendants started a rumor that one of my sister’s special attendants had taken something from the queen’s room. Word reached high enough and the poor woman lost her position.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, trying to be sympathetic. 

“I became curious about the fate of this cast-off attendant,” Psyche said. “I constantly asked after her. How was she doing? Was she okay? The cooks would tell me that no one would speak to her. The gardeners said no one would marry her. 

“She wasn’t just cast out of the palace, she was rejected by the whole kingdom and branded a thief.”

“I see,” he said. 

It fascinated her that he didn’t mind her talking. One of her sisters would have interrupted by now. 

“But she wasn’t a thief,” Psyche said. 

“Oh? How do you know?” he asked.

“I can’t properly tell the story without giving everyone names,” she said. 

“It only makes sense,” he said, sounding somewhat amused. 

She felt for the back of the chair and sat down again.

“Chloe was the young attendant who had started the rumor. Iris was Aglaura’s attendant,” Psyche said, getting back into the story. “Being somewhat young myself, I decided to talk to Chloe and ask her about Iris. At first Chloe would only repeat what everyone else had said about Iris. She was a thief. She got what she deserved. 

“But there was something in her voice that made me want to know more. So I kept asking. Being the youngest of the princesses, most of the attendants didn’t fear me.

“Eventually, Chloe started talking about how jealous she felt as Iris got more and more attention from the queen and from my sisters. Iris really was quite marvelous and Aglaura depended completely on her. 

“And one day, it came out. Chloe admitted to inventing the whole thing just to ruin Iris.”

“I see,” he said. “So after you found out the truth, what did you do?”

“Again, I was rather young then and didn’t have as much experience in what to do. So I made a grand announcement and, without intending to, turned everyone against Chloe. It was Chloe then who lost her place and was rejected by the kingdom. No one would employ her. No one would talk to her.

“I felt horrible,” she said.

“But don’t you think Chloe got what she deserved?” he asked. “Didn’t she bring it upon herself by spreading the lie in the first place?”

Psyche thought about how to explain.

“Chloe did bring it upon herself in the sense that she created the story that ruined Iris. Logic would say that it was only fair that Chloe be punished in-kind.

“Except in both cases, we all suffered.   

“Iris knew the rhythm of the palace so well. Her ability to use her talents helped the whole palace run more smoothly. She worked with others, created harmony and satisfaction by playing her small, but significant part. 

“When Iris was sent away the whole palace was on edge. Security around the palace dramatically increased. Attendants and workers were constantly monitored and searched to ensure that nothing else was stolen.

“Aglaura was more ill-tempered because she had to retrain attendants who didn’t know her as well as Iris did. Cydippe was affected by Aglaura’s moods and would be more out of sorts herself. Things were less joyful and everyone began performing far below their abilities. Everyone was afraid of getting into trouble. Everyone was afraid of making mistakes. And so, naturally, they made more mistakes and got into more trouble. 

“But having Iris back and punishing Chloe didn’t solve the problem. 

“I watched Iris as she returned to the palace. She resented Chloe and everyone who had believed her lies. She did her duties but ignored the need to harmonize her efforts with the others. She returned to shining as a skilled attendant, but it was dulled by her failure to work with those around her. She was still wounded and broken from the unfair treatment.

“I decided to talk to Iris. 

“Iris was more than happy to talk to me, attributing her return to her position to me and my efforts. Truly, I feel like it was Iris’s good deeds which redeemed her in the end. I only brought the truth to light. 

“Still, I was curious. I asked her what it had been like to be so unfairly treated? Iris had suffered and struggled under the weight of the injustice. According to Iris, Chloe deserved to suffer for what she did. 

“I told Iris that Chloe didn’t get what she deserved, and neither did Iris, even if she had taken something,” Psyche said. “The whole system is flawed.” 

“Wait,” he interrupted. “Are you saying you felt that Chloe shouldn’t have been punished, and that even if Iris had stolen something, she shouldn’t have been punished either?”

“Right,” she said. 

“But, wouldn’t that just encourage others to lie as Chloe did? Or if Iris really was a thief, wouldn’t she have continued stealing if you had let her go unpunished?” he said. 

“Not necessarily,” Psyche said. “It’s part of a bigger picture and how things fit together.” 

“What do you mean?” he asked.

Psyche paused, thinking.

“Take the situation with Iris being accused of stealing,” she said. “Even if something had been taken from the palace, the problem wasn’t the loss of an object, it was how we reacted to it. 

“All of the suspicion and dysfunction in the aftermath affected trade. We lost several opportunities to grow as a kingdom because of how we dealt with Iris. It likely cost us more than the value of any trinket.”

“Hmm,” he said. “So, what did you do?”

“I had to change the way at least some of the people viewed things,” Psyche said. “I started with Iris. I told her how much the palace had suffered in her absence. She needed to know how valuable and important her work was, and how much she was needed. 

“I also told her what had happened to everyone when she was punished. Hearing how the whole kingdom had suffered softened her heart a good deal. 

“Then I mentioned Chloe. I pointed out that Chloe had acted out of simple jealousy. Chloe admired Iris, but didn’t know how to become more like her. Rather than aspiring to be more, she conspired to eliminate the competition.”

“How did you know that?” he said.

“From talking to Chloe. It was clear she so desperately wanted to be like Iris, but she had no idea how. She reverted to the only logic left to her. See Iris as competition and bring her down,” Psyche said.

“So what happened?” he asked.

“A miracle,” she said. “Iris, because of her true nature, used her gifts and talents to help lift the work and environment at the palace. She helped heal some of the wounds and everyone felt much better. Even more amazing was that because of her example, people became more kind and understanding around the palace. People were more forgiving, more helpful, more understanding. They also worked better, happier, and more efficiently. 

“But the most miraculous thing, in my mind, was when Iris came with me to visit Chloe. It was one of the most wonderful experiences to watch them work together to repair the hurt they both felt. Healed, we all helped the village forgive Chloe and give her another chance. 

“Chloe never did work in the palace again, but we have remained friends,” Psyche said.

“Astonishing,” he said. 

“Isn’t it?” she said, happily. 

“I can see why you enjoyed interacting with the people. The way you tell it makes it quite interesting,” he said. “And to be able to work with people that way, I can see why they started worshipping you.”

Psyche frowned.

“It was never my intention,” she said. 

“I know,” he said softly. “But sometimes people can’t help it.” 

“I should have done something,” she said. 

“Honestly, what could you have done?” he said. “It’s a simple mortal impulse to worship those who help make their lives better. You improved the lives of the people around you, Psyche. It’s only natural that they would eventually come to worship you. It would have been against your nature to reject their appreciation and worship.” 

Psyche faltered. 

“But worship is for the gods,” Psyche said, trying to hold to what she knew was right. “I should have known better. I should not have let it grow so big. It’s one thing to accept tokens of gratitude. It’s quite another to let people build an entire shrine to my name.”

“Well,” he said, unconvinced. “I don’t think you could have done anything differently. Things have a way of growing on their own, beyond what we can control. And because you blessed so many people, of course it would naturally keep growing.” 

Psyche felt confused. 

Would it have been beyond her power to stop people worshipping her? 

If only she had Apollo’s oracle to talk to again. 

Well, not the oracle who pronounced the will of the gods, but the oracle she’d talked to in Apollo’s temple. 

“Isn’t that why I’m here?” Psyche said. “Isn’t that why I’m being punished? All of the false worship. The shrine? That’s why I accepted Aphrodite’s punishment. I figured it would help the people turn back to worshipping the gods, where worship belongs.”

But she felt tears welling up in her eyes. 

She had tried so hard to accept her punishment, for the good of the people. It’s just that — the punishment seemed to ignore her intention. She had meant to help and she made the gods angry. 

Now she would never see her people again. 

The tears started to flow more freely as she couldn’t help feeling the weight of failure and confusion. 

She felt his arms around her and he pulled her into him. She willingly rested against him.

“Psyche,” he said. “For what it’s worth, I don’t think you deserve to be punished.” 

“You —  you don’t?” she said as she sniffed.

“No,” he said. “Punished for what? For doing good? For helping people realize their life could be better?

“Psyche, you’ve accepted the will of the gods. That says more about you than you know. You didn’t turn away from what you felt was right. You bravely faced whatever was waiting for you at the top of that hill. I don’t know of many mortals who would do that.

“Don’t you realize how amazing you are?”

Psyche closed her eyes and leaned closer to him.

“Psyche, I admire how much you’ve learned from the villagers, their struggles and their toils, but that doesn’t mean you need to live like them. You’ve already accepted your punishment,” he said. “There’s no need to lower yourself further.” 

She pulled away slightly, but he kept his arms around her. 

“I’m not lowering myself,” she said. “I just know that it doesn’t take riches to be happy. I can be just as content in this cottage as I could be in any palace.” 

“I believe you,” he said.

She couldn’t tell if he was just trying to be agreeable or if he actually believed her. 

“I’ll prove it to you,” she said. “I can show you that it doesn’t take lavish comfort to be happy.” 

“Alright then,” he said. “We’ll continue to live in this cottage as you show me the ways to be happy.” 

She wasn’t sure if he was serious, but she was glad that he was willing to give her a chance. 

It was quite refreshing, actually. 

Not one of her sisters had ever been able to understand her love for the people. And they were completely confused by her desire for simpler things. 

“Thank you,” she said, feeling a surge of deep gratitude. 

“My pleasure,” he said. 

She felt him kiss her before disappearing for the night.

It didn’t feel like much. More like the kiss of a friend. 

And yet, there was still a connection, a reflection of their conversation. 

It was so strange. 

Psyche lay awake thinking. 

What if she had married a man like High King or Lord Whats-his-name? Right now she would likely be juggling an impossible schedule of household management and entertaining guests. For all of her sisters’ bragging about their partners, they equally complained about their duties.

Psyche’s husband was so easy to talk to. He was so kind and understanding. 

He was part of her punishment??

What an odd twist of the Fates.

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