WHY 'FOCUS ON THE KIDS" ADVICE IGNORES YOUR RIGHT TO HEAL

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In this episode of The Restart Academy Podcast, I'm calling out advice that gets handed to divorced mothers constantly and sounds caring on the surface, but is actually toxic and harmful to both you and your children.

If you've been told to "focus on the kids" and put your own healing on the back burner, if you feel guilty every time you take time for therapy or self-care, if you've been made to believe that being a good mother means sacrificing your mental health, this episode is for you.

I'm Temi Samuel, and as a wellness coach who went through my own devastating divorce over a decade ago, I understand the pressure to be the "strong mom" who keeps everything together while falling apart inside. But here's what I've learned: that mythical woman doesn't exist, and trying to become her is destroying you.

🎧 In this episode, we explore:

• Why the "strong mom" myth is impossible and harmful
• How "focus on the kids" advice actually enables your ex's bad behavior
• What your children actually need vs. what you think they need
• Why taking care of yourself IS taking care of your kids
• The airplane oxygen mask principle applied to divorce recovery
• How to model healthy emotional processing for your children

This isn't about being selfish or neglecting your children. This is about recognizing that you can't pour from an empty cup, and that the best gift you can give your kids isn't a mother who pretends to be fine - it's a mother who shows them what healthy healing looks like.

Your right to heal isn't secondary to anyone else's needs. Your mental health isn't less important than everyone else's comfort. And your children deserve to see what it looks like when someone prioritizes their own well-being.

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• 💝 REMEMBER: You're not broken, you're rebuilding. You're not behind, you're exactly where you need to be. Your restart story is going to be incredible.
  The Restart Academy Podcast provides educational content and personal experiences. This podcast is not a substitute for professional therapy, legal advice, or medical treatment. If you're in crisis, please reach out to appropriate professional services in your area.
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