The Unimportance of Being Liked at Work

The podcast episode offers a nuanced perspective on professional likeability, asserting that while some forms of being liked are beneficial, an obsession with it can be detrimental.

It distinguishes between:

• "Good" Likeability: This involves genuine actions like practicing active listening, being kind and courteous, using positive body language, offering praise, and learning colleagues' names. These behaviors foster natural friendships, a sense of belonging, and can lead to better career opportunities and improved mental health. Research supports that well-liked employees are often more trusted and supported, making collaboration easier.

• "Bad" or Damaging Likeability: This occurs when the pursuit of approval leads to compromising oneself. Examples include rejecting compliments, engaging in gossip, giving inauthentic flattery, constantly doing favors at the expense of one's own work, or being a silent bystander to mistreatment. The podcast/article highlights that obsessing over being liked can backfire by appearing disingenuous or insecure, making one wishy-washy, emotionally draining, and hindering the ability to say no when necessary. It particularly notes that women often face a "double-bind" where competence can be perceived as inversely related to likeability.

Ultimately, the episode encourages listeners to prioritize their genuine ideas, goals, and vision over the need to be universally liked, advising to "Be kind, be fair, and be honest on your way to the top".