3.05: Highwayman Dick Turpin is nabbed!... or is he? — The Jolly Fishmonger. — "My Wife's Funny Thing" (yes, that's exactly what he's singing about!) (A Twopenny Torrid minisode)

A "spicy" (-ish) Tuesday Twopenny Terrible minisode IN WHICH —

0:01:22: HIGHWAYMAN DICK TURPIN, Ch. 18-19, IN WHICH —:

• Leaving the church, Dick strikes out on foot for London, hoping to get Black Bess back. Then he meets a farmer with a wagon load of turnips and carrots, heading for Covent-garden market. The farmer gives Dick a lift. But, has the farmer recognized him? Will he try to turn him in and collect the £1000 reward? We shall see.

0:19:29: THREE SALACIOUS SALOON SONGS:

• "The Jolly Fishmonger," a frisky supper-club "flash song" from the 1830s, of the type sung lustily by, um, gentlemen when there were no ladies about. This one tells the story of the amorous adventure of a Strand fishmonger using as many fish and fishing puns as possible.
• "Madam Sneak," which tries more for funny than sexy. The last word of every line is omitted from the original text, but it's "arse."
• "My Wife's Funny Thing." Yes, it's THAT funny thing. It's nothing less than a whole 35-line drinking-song about lady-bits, phrased carefully enough that even George Carlin could sing it on TV without getting in trouble.

Join host Finn J.D. John. for a half-hour-long spree through the scandal-sheets and story papers of old London! Grab a decanter and top off your glass, unload your stumps, and let's go!

GLOSSARY OF FLASH TERMS USED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Roses, pinks and tulips: Aristocrats and high-society toffs.

• Knight of the brush and moon: Drunken fellow wandering amok in fields and ditches trying to stagger home.
• Chaffing: Talking and bantering while taking a glass or two.
• Crib: House, room, or chamber (modern equivalent is "joint"). Originally and still also used to refer to a prostitute's bedroom.

• Pippin: A funny fellow (of either sex); also a friendly way of greeting: How are you, my pippins?
• Bolt the moon: Fly by night
• Beaks: Magistrates, law enforcement authorities
• The tippy: The very best

FISH TERMS AND FLASH WORDS FROM "THE JOLLY FISHMONGER":

• As merry a grig: "Merry as a grig" was 1830s slang for "full of fun."
• "Reckoned a soul" means "considered a heavy drinker" — but of course "soul" is spelled like the fish here, SOLE.
• "In love with a maid" — in the 1830s "maid" meant "old maid." As a bonus, juvenile female sticklebacks are called maids. Our poet gets more mileage out of this one in the last line, although he calls the fish "thornback"; it's the same fish.
• "She dabb'd him" — "dab" meant lots of things, but one of them was to punch or slap. And, there was a type of flatfish called a dab.
• "She always delighted to play with his cod." Many possibilities here could mean his purse, or his scrotum; but the obvious reference is to a certain fish-shaped nether appendage (see: CODPIECE).
• "Would you not wish to have been in his plaice" — a plaice is a type of flatfish.
• "The neighbors smelt out" — a smelt is a type of small oily fish.