Forgiveness is a Choice: A Kandid Chat on Toxic Forgiveness

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Let's get kandid about Toxic Forgiveness!!

On this episode, I was privileged to engage in a critical discussion about toxic forgiveness with the remarkable Michelle Agopsowicz. Michelle is a Counselor, Reiki Master, and the founder of Illuminated Path Counseling.

The Stats:

In a recent poll conducted in the Kandidly Speaking Facebook group, participants were asked if they felt pressured to forgive someone before they were emotionally ready. The results showed that 67% answered "Yes," 32% answered "No, I only forgive when I am ready," and 1% responded, "Maybe, not sure what that means."

Key Takeaways:

• Toxic forgiveness occurs in relationships where individuals feel pressured or manipulated to forgive
• Forgiveness is a personal and organic process and there should be no shame in not forgiving
• Some events may be unforgivable and sacred anger is a natural response to them such as racism, misogyny, war, sexual abuse, and physical abuse.
• Forgiveness is not always necessary to move forward, and one is not a lesser person for not forgiving
• Toxic positivity can result in denying one's feelings and negative physical and emotional effects such as depression, anxiety, anger, and bitterness.
• Healthy forgiveness is found on an individual's terms, it may take time to reach, and is different for everyone
• Setting boundaries and communication is important in forgiveness
• Forgiveness can come in unexpected ways 
• The importance of holding space for people instead of offering advice and trying to fix their problems.

For those working to overcome toxic forgiveness, focus on grounding yourself, reclaiming your energy through breathing, and setting boundaries in a gentle and empathetic manner. If you're trying to help someone, reflect on why you may seek toxic forgiveness from others, as it may come from your discomfort. If your goal is to assist, offer support by creating a safe space for the person and acknowledging their pain without trying to solve it.

Guest Contact information:

https://www.facebook.com/IlluminatedPathCounselling/

https://youtube.com/@illuminatedpathcounselling

https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelle-agopsowicz-a74672219

https://www.illuminatedpathcounselling.com/

About Michelle:

Michelle Agopsowicz holds a Master's degree in Social Work and a Bachelor's in Disability Studies, in addition to being a Reiki Master. Her counseling services and educational programs adopt a holistic and trauma-informed approach to wellness and balance. Michelle combines traditional counseling techniques with mindfulness practices, honed through her personal experience with autoimmune conditions, trauma, and anxiety.

She provides guidance to live a more fulfilling and genuine life with self-compassion. Michelle is a firm believer that trauma is a universal human experience that impacts the body, mind, an

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