What to Do with a Dead Body, Who’s in Charge, and Who Pays

What do you actually do when someone dies? Call 911, the coroner, or Google “funeral homes near me”? In this episode, director of pre-planning at Feldman Mortuary in Denver, Colorado, Jamie Sarche, returns to The Death Readiness Podcast to demystify what really happens behind the scenes after a death. We discuss how a lack of planning can leave your family vulnerable to grief, manipulation, and financial strain, why skipping a funeral can backfire, and how pre-planning can be the ultimate act of love.

We discuss:

Whom to call when someone dies at home

• Why calling 911 is often required unless hospice is involved
• The role of hospice, coroners, and funeral homes in body removal and care

What happens to the body

• Where the body goes after death
• Differences in funeral home care practices

Who makes decisions after a death

• How state law determines who has authority
• Why written declarations are often unknown or unused
• Complications with second marriages and family dynamics

Why funeral pre-planning matters

• Avoiding manipulation and overspending during grief
• Ensuring your family knows your wishes and avoids unnecessary financial strain

The costs of funerals

• How pre-paying through a funeral home can lock in prices and protect loved ones

The emotional side of funerals

• The six needs of mourning (Jamie and Jill discuss Dr. Alan Wolfelt’s framework)
• Why skipping funerals can lead to complicated grief
• How funerals create meaning, community, and continued connection

Final expense insurance vs. funeral pre-payment plans

Actionable steps you can take

• Conversations to have with family now
• How even simple communal gatherings can support healthy grieving

Resources & Links

• Jamie’s previous conversation on The Death Readiness Podcast: What You Need to Know about Embalming, Cremation and Eco-friendly Funerals
• Jamie’s speaking engagements:
  • TEDx talk: Breaking down the taboos about death
  • Death Rituals: Creating Jewish Life
• Jamie’s Body Talk article
• Jill’s Obituary Writing Tool– A guided resource for drafting an obituary using ChatGPT
• Jamie’s Six Needs of Mourning Guide

Connect with Jamie:

• Email: [email protected]
• Learn more about Feldman Mortuary

Connect with Jill:

• Website: DeathReadiness.com
• Email: [email protected]
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This podcast provides estate planning guidance for women and discusses real, practical issues, from caregiving, pre-planning a funeral, how to avoid probate using beneficiary designations, planning for individuals with special needs (and special needs trusts), whether you need a professional fiduciary (trustee or executor), how the estate tax works and how to preserve your legacy.

Tuesday Triage episodes answer questions from listeners like you, from powers of attorney, healthcare advance directives (and whether they work when you’re pregnant), what a Last Will and Testament really is, whether you need a trust, how Medicaid works and how to have senior and elder care conversations and how to care for aging parents.

Disclaimer: This podcast and all related content are for educational purposes only and do not constitute legal advice. No attorney-client relationship is established here. Use of this information without careful analysis and review by your attorney, CPA, and/or financial advisor may cause serious adverse consequences. For legal guidance tailored to your unique situation, consult with a licensed attorney in your state.