George counts steps

George was a pirate, but he wasn’t a very good pirate.

He was always pacing the deck, back and forth.

“Why are you walking all the time?” the captain asked.

“I bought a step-counting smartwatch,” said George. “I have to get five thousand steps in each day to stay fit.”

The captain smirked. “You could always do that by raping, looting, and pillaging.”

“This is way easier,” said George. “And a lot less messy.”

George walked away, but the captain tripped him up.

George fell and broke his nose, bleeding all over the deck.

“What a mess,” said the captain.