The Grief of Divorce and Forgiving Someone Who Has Hurt You: Grace's Story

In today's episode, Laura is joined by Grace Ruiz, a real estate agent from Las Vegas who is also a homeschooling mother of two. She shares her marriage, separation, and divorce story and how these experiences led her to a closer relationship with God. She discusses the pain and the healing process, emphasizing that despite the hurt, she would go through it all again because it brought her to where she is now in her faith.

Grace highlights the necessity of repeatedly forgiving her ex-husband, not for his sake, but for her peace and ability to move forward. She also touches on the need to forgive oneself for any perceived failings or unfulfilled expectations within the marriage. She shares her experience of mourning the death of her marriage and the importance of allowing oneself to grieve and heal fully before moving on to new relationships. Grace also stresses the importance of not using children as a means to hurt an ex-partner and the value of maintaining a healthy, communicative relationship for the sake of the kids.

Join the conversation now, and remember it's okay to be in the middle of the mess while bravely showing up and healing! 

[00:01:57] Grace's Journey to Faith and Divorce

[00:03:09] Finding Closeness with God Through Divorce

[00:06:22] The Grieving Process Post-Divorce

[00:08:02] The Importance of Forgiveness

[00:11:13] Human Thoughts and Divine Guidance

[00:14:02] Co-Parenting Relationship Post-Divorce

[00:17:11]The Impact of Amicable Co-Parenting on Children

[00:18:30] The Process and Timeframe of Forgiveness

[00:20:10] The Consequences of Unforgiveness

[00:21:30] Tips for Healing After Divorce

[00:23:22] Personal Healing Activities

[00:26:07] Taking Time for Yourself

[00:28:25] The Impact of Divorce on Children

[00:30:01] Advice on Co-Parenting and Letting Kids See Their Father

[00:32:30] Sharing Divorce Experiences Selectively

[00:35:12] The Personal Nature of Forgiveness

[00:36:19] The Positive Outcome of Following Divine Guidance

[00:37:45] Human Reactions to Hurt

• I didn't get married to get divorced, even when I was. Okay. I didn't get married to get divorced. Right. We separated. It's like, I didn't want to talk about it, right? Because during that separation, you're really in survival mode. Yeah. And questioning everything like, how did we go from semi okay to like, like, now we're done.
• It's not easy to forgive somebody who did harm to you intentionally. But the forgiveness is for you to let it go and to move on.
• If you don't forgive, you'll become resentful and bitter. You'll start seeing the world bad, like everything's so horrible. 
• Forgive him, forgive yourself. From the chain because it doesn't even matter at that point now that it's over. 
• Align yourself with godly women, women who, I mean, do not necessarily have to have gone through a divorce but who can guide you and give you wisdom.
• My advice would be to just look, heal now, however that is to you. So when that time comes when you meet somebody else or when you're ready to move on with some life, you are not moving from a step of being hurt. 
• Let the children go with their father, right? Because they all need all kids in a father figure. And that's just statistically based and educated before. And you can see if they are willing to care for the kids. Now you're hurting your kids. Right? Now you're hurting. Now you're the one hurting your kids.

FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com

BOOKS & JOURNALS: https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards

GRACE'S JOURNAL: https://graceruiz.gumroad.com/l/emvdvs

GRACE'S INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/graceruizrealestateagent

CONNECT WITH GRACE: https://linktr.ee/graceruiz

Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com

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