1. EachPod

#194 Transformation and comfort do not live in the same house: rethinking comfort zones, familiarity, and change

Author
That Hoarder
Published
Fri 11 Jul 2025
Episode Link
https://infouidd.podbean.com/e/194-transformation-and-comfort-do-not-live-in-the-same-house-rethinking-comfort-zones-familiarity-and-change/


Transformation and comfort rarely go hand in hand, especially when it comes to overcoming compulsive hoarding.


In this episode, I talk honestly about why making real change means facing discomfort, based on a quote from Healing Justice London that “transformation and comfort do not live in the same house”.


I challenge us to identify the difference between familiarity and comfort, and share practical ways to push through those tough moments - because growth comes from getting a bit uncomfortable.


If you’re tired of mistaking chaos for comfort, this one’s for you.



  • “Transformation and comfort do not live in the same house” (Healing Justice London)

  • The universal truth behind the idea

  • The necessity of discomfort for real transformation

  • Discomfort Versus Comfort in the Hoarding Context

  • Familiarity as a source of “comfort” for those who hoard

  • Risks of equating familiarity with true comfort

  • The need for change and its inherent discomfort

  • Examples of positive outcomes after embracing discomfort

  • The Reality of Discomfort in Dehoarding

  • Emotional and physical challenges of dehoarding

  • Potential for overwhelming feelings and anxiety

  • Catastrophising and perfectionism surrounding decision-making

  • Emotional toll of letting go and possible identity implications

  • Acknowledgement that discomfort does not mean failure

  • Familiarity Versus Authentic Comfort

  • Distinction between feeling comfortable and something being familiar

  • The false sense of control and security provided by clutter

  • The actual consequences of living in a hoarded home:

  • Physical hazards (tripping, blocked access, risk in emergencies)

  • Social isolation and shame

  • Lack of practical comfort (e.g., not sleeping in one’s own bed)

  • The hidden, ongoing “slow burn” of stress and discomfort

  • Motivation and Community

  • Importance of recognising the true discomfort of living with hoarding

  • Community connections via the podcast and accountability Zoom sessions

  • Methods to share resources and reduce isolation

  • Reframing Discomfort as Growth

  • Viewing discomfort as a sign of progress rather than a warning

  • The parallel discomforts of both dehoarding and continuing to hoard

  • Making conscious choices between competing difficulties

  • Strategies for Managing Discomfort

  • Taking small, manageable steps to build resilience

  • Being gentle and compassionate with oneself during the process

  • Reaching out for support (friends, family, therapist, peer groups)

  • The use and benefit of accountability sessions

  • The Broader Benefits of Transformation

  • Improved physical space and wellbeing

  • Increased self-confidence and pride

  • Better relationships and decreased shame

  • Regaining practical functionality and freedom at home

  • Enhanced overall quality of life

  • Practical Suggestions and Further Resources

  • Trying a small, uncomfortable but positive task today

  • References to previous episodes for deeper exploration:

  • Sitting with discomfort and distress tolerance (Episode 49)

  • Building resilience (Episode 70 with Dr. Jan Eppingstall)


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