Stepping Outside – Step One (Part 2)

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Continuing with our practical application of step one, and trying to remember I am powerless over everything! For many years, as I thought it was doing this step, I only thought of my powerlessness as having to do with alcohol. When I finally did these 12 steps in earnest, which I guess means really living the steps, I was so sick and disgusted with my life that I realized I was powerless over everything. So, I guess these episodes are about my functioning in the world, knowing full well that nothing is really under my control. This realization, at least for me, was both frightening and exhilarating when it happened. The frightening part was in knowing that I had to “let go”, that I had to “lose control”. Was I ready and willing to do that?

The exhilarating part was that in some way, some wonderful, spiritual way, I would not be responsible. I know. I know. Of course, I was responsible for my actions as a human being my motivation was that of muck my Spirit.