…and today I cracked.

This is the raw real life version of riding the waves of life - the lows as well as the highs. It’s not always roses, we’re not always strong- it only matters if we can rise up from when we fall. Saying Tehillim grounds me and makes me feel like I am actually making a difference. Our sincere tefillos to Hashem are protecting our soldiers and the families in israel. It’s a war of prayer. Hashem is the only one in control, who and what are we choosing to put our faith in? Reading the English soothes me so deeply because I realize how much this always was in the plan. Hashem is stronger than any of this. Hashem is bigger than all of this. There is a plan. We may be in misery, excruciatingly mind numbing heart wrenching pain - and we will pray through it. We will CAPITALIZE on the pain and desperation by using it as a channel for prayer. Please Hashem end this now! Only You can solve this. The world is just a mask. Nothing is real other than Ein Od Milvado, there is only You. Please accept our tefillos, we’re a changed people. We’re doing better. We sincerely do love each other. I promise. Please believe in us and trust us, and continue to fuel us with the strength to keep holding on.