EP014 Manipulation and Control

Welcome to episode fourteen where we get into what manipulation and control look like, their destructiveness in relationships, and how they relate to healthy boundary setting.

 I believe manipulation is one of the most toxic behaviors in a relationship because you cannot feel emotionally safe or have trust when there is manipulation.  It is dishonest and often invisible at first, so it can be so crazy-making and greatly impact your sense of self! It is not safe to be open and vulnerable and usually leads to tons of conflict and often an end to a relationship.  We also identify other forms of control that also can thwart connection.  If you sense there is manipulation in your relationship, this is a great episode to help you identify it. 

Key Elements

·       Identify what emotional manipulation is and why it’s so toxic

·       Look at fear-based control and where it comes from

·       Contrast these with detaching and risking setting healthy limits to be more loving

I cannot simultaneously

set a boundary with you

and

take care of your feelings.

- Melody Beattie

Resources

Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

The Disease to Please by Harriet Braiker

Emotional Blackmail by Dr. Susan Forward

Thanks for Listening!