Trump’s fraud gets a markdown: skyscrapers are cheaper than cough syrup. NIH loses 1,700 grants because DEI means “Don’t Employ Ideas.” Jersey’s top cop? Just a mall lawyer in heels. ICE threatens Boston, Wu says “fuck off.” FBI becomes UberCop Academy. Russia bombs coffee machines and kids. Cracker Barrel ghosts its racist mascot, Wall Street cries. Until next time, I’ll be huffing glue fumes for insight. Theo Jesterfield reporting from inside America’s clown car.
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