Sibling Rivalry Across a Lifetime
- Author
- Theresa Hubbard and Walker Bird
- Published
- Fri 29 Aug 2025
- Episode Link
- https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/myinnerknowing/episodes/Sibling-Rivalry-Across-a-Lifetime-e37f978
"We’re all little, aren’t we? Our little bitty selves looking for the experience of being seen, heard, valued, loved, appreciated."
Sibling rivalry doesn’t stay in childhood. The roles we grow up playing — the golden child, the baby, the black sheep, the caretaker — often follow us into adulthood, shaping our sense of worth and how we connect with family.
In this conversation, Walker and Theresa share their personal stories of sibling rivalry and favoritism, reflecting on what happens when old patterns resurface later in life. They talk about how family roles can weigh us down, what it means to step out of them, and how compassion and honesty can open the door to healing with siblings.
We explore:
→ How birth order and favoritism influence sibling dynamics
→ Why rivalry often continues long after childhood
→ A simple practice for softening sibling relationships with love
✨ Subscribe, comment, or share with someone who’d connect with this conversation. We’re so grateful you’re here. And if you’d like more ways to keep exploring, we’ve linked our free mini-course and YouTube series below.
Episode Links & Resources
The Depression Cure by Dr. Stephen Ilardi
Free Mini-Course – 5 Foundations for Healthier Relationships
YouTube Series – Conversations We Needed With Our Parents Growing Up
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Episode Chapters
00:00 Free mini-course on healthy relationships
00:41 A Christmas gift and birth order roles
02:00 Sibling rivalry as a lifelong theme
03:56 Family gatherings and pecking order
07:40 Competing for approval and attention
13:36 The flower song story
18:23 Money, favoritism, and family roles
29:58 Letting go of old family roles
38:40 Overt and covert favoritism
48:26 Loving siblings with authenticity
56:01 Can we meet our own needs?
01:07:04 Choosing intentional connection
Topics we explore in this episode include:
sibling rivalry in adulthood, family dynamics and self-worth, healing sibling relationships, birth order psychology, favoritism in families, navigating family roles, trauma and family healing, compassionate communication, letting go of childhood roles, cultivating healthy adult sibling connections
