Monkeys With Matches
A Comedian a Musician and a Jew is a podcast featuring comedy, music, philosophy and snarky comment.
The cast includes Jonathan Thymius, a nationally recognized comedian who has starred in films, late show television, was a finalist on Last Comic Standing and is always on the verge of something great.
Craig is a composer and French Horn player who spent most of his childhood on a New Mexico cattle ranch. Craig moved out west in 1988 to follow his dreams of playing in an orchestra and now lives in Silicon Valley where he spends every waking moment trying to meet his expenses.
Bernie is a renowned sperm donor from Denver Colorado. He divides his time between his job in the steel industry and his monkey. Bernie loves riding his bike, scolding his dog for biting people and being too old to attract young women.
- Update frequency
- every 19 days
- Average duration
- 21 minutes
- Episodes
- 67
- Years Active
- 2016 - 2021
The Way of the Turtle
There once was a turtle named Mitch, The Dems thought of him as a bitch, He kissed the beasts ass, The beast pushed out some gas, Forever Mitch has found his sweet nitch.
Bill Devlin Part 1
Ever wonder what angry monkeys, Hüsker Dü, Church Picnic and some guy named Carrie have in common? Monkeys With Matches, thats what.
Shall We Overcome?
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter - Martin Luther King
The Illuminati
Too many things are occurring for even a big heart to hold. -Yeats
Joseph Skokie
Ships that pass in the night, and speak each other in passing, only a signal shown, and a distant voice in the darkness; So on the ocean of life, we pass and speak one another, only a look and a voic…
Unicorn Santa Pony Tail
The only reason people don't know much is because they do not care to know. They are incurious. Incuriousity is the oddest and most foolish failing there is. -Stephen Fry
She's A Star
My candle burns at both ends; It will not last the night But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends— It gives a lovely light! -Edna Millay
Jack
The little fish eats the tiny fish, the big fish eats the little fish. So only the biggest fish gets fat. Do you know any folks like that? -Anonymous
Kamala
Still I Rise
"You may shoot me with your words, You may cut me with your eyes, You may kill me with your hatefulness, But still, like air, I’ll rise.” -Maya Angelou
Question 3
A voice said, look me in the stars and tell me truly, men of earth, if all the soul-and-body scars, were not too much to pay for birth.
-Robert Frost
Question 2
A piece of gum lay on the ground, it's minty fresh taste long ago gone. It had been chewed and chewed until tired jaw. It bended my heart, my mind, my awe.
Question 1
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process they do not become monsters. If you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you. -Nietzsche
Us Don't Have To Worry Bout Covid
Prezident Cheezel deletes lockdown, deletes the World Health Organization, deletes the memory of George Floyd, then hunkers in his hunker bunker, hunkers with freedom fries at midnight, a lights out …
Gaia's Had Enough
The Nihilist
The flowers betrayed The colors decayed Soaking with dismay It's death they might say Where they all lose and no one wins But this is how your life begins
- anonymous
Total Collapse
Nation State
The heights by great men reached and kept Were not attained by sudden flight, But they, while their companions slept, Were toiling upward in the night. -Longfellow
COVID Calling
What are heavy? Sea-sand and sorrow; What are brief? Today and tomorrow; What are frail? Spring blossoms and youth; What are deep? The ocean and truth.
- Christina Rossetti