MO2H 4: Liverpool vs Southampton

Match of Two Halves returns after a week’s break, just like the Premier League. We don’t actually time our holidays around the fixture list – the FA Cup break just happened to coincide with a lovely weekend away with friends in Lisbon, and our reaching our the monthly limit for free podcast hosting. Anyway, like Liverpool and Tottenham, our European adventure is over and we’re back to concentrating on the Premier League. This week we cover football news, trivia and games, along with a focus on the battle between Liverpool and Southampton, who are at the time of writing both still in contention for the Champions League positions.

Or download it here. (Follow the link, then right-click and save) Premier League songs, jokes, analysis, games and speculation – tell your friends or share on Facebook! To stay up-to-date with new episodes you can subscribe via iTunes to A Match of Two Halves. To sing along with us, click on “Continue Reading” for the lyrics.

“Brendan and the Reds”

Hey fans, Liverpool forever

We all love the team and so we think we’re something special

We’re the best fans… you’ll never walk alone

You’re gonna hear us sing at Anfield or have a moan

Say, Can and Moreno, have you seen them yet

Skrtel and Mignolet, Ibe-Ibe-Ibe-Ibe and the other Reds

Oh, Balotelli, Markovic

Oh Brendan, he’s really keen.

On Sterling, Lovren, Henderson

Allen, Sturridge and Coutin-ho

Be-Be-Brendan and the Reds

Hey team, you act like it’s a given

You deserve to be the champions

But you mope around like victims

Just feeling sorry for yourselves

It’s no surprise that Anfield’s got so many empty trophy shelves

Say, Can and Moreno, have you seen them yet

Skrtel and Mignolet, Ibe-ibe-ibe-ibe-ibe and the other Reds

Oh, Balotelli, Markovic

Oh Brendan, he’s really keen

On Sterling, Lovren, Henderson

Allen, Sturridge and Coutin-ho

Be-Be-Brendan and the Reds

Brendan, Brendan and the Reds

Brendan, Brendan, Brendan, Brendan and the Reds

original song and music by Elton John and Bernie Taupin (“Bennie and the Jets”)

“Hey Dude”

Hey dude, don’t take it bad

Though it’s sad and you are dejected

Remember it’s happened to you before

Leaving you sore, cause you’ve been rejected

Hey dude, of course you’re scarred

It’s a hard thing to get over

Being dumped at the age of fifteen

But you’re now thirty three, so accept that it’s over

And if you feel like giving in, hey dude, begin

To seriously explore it – quitting’s viable

You know you could be making your mark at Villa Park

If only you weren’t still in denial

La la la Lambert, la la la la

Dejan, don’t get too down

There’s still Russell Brown, your fashion label

So what if you’re benched on every match day?

Stand up, walk away, take a seat at your sewing table

Sew up some hems, and take seams in, Dejan, begin

Your second career as a designer

And though you once played some football, Dejan, that’s all

Gone – your Liverpool role is pretty minor

La la la Lovren, la la la la

Hey dude, don’t feel ashamed

Though your name’s mud at Southampton

Remember you made a transfer request wasn’t that for the best, now isn’t it

Better better better better better better, oh

La la la Lalalana, Lalalana, hey dude

original song and music by John Lennon and Paul McCartney (“Hey Jude”)

“We’re in the Money”

We’re in the money, we’re in the money

We’ve got some great young players, and we always sell ’em on

Financial outlook is pretty sunny

Our players go to rich teams and we replace them for a song

There was a hefty price tag to bag Luke Shaw

We bought a bargain Bertrand – a profitable trade, millions made

We’re in the profit, we’re rich as chocolate

Don’t flash it – cash or stash it, in case a rainy day comes along

Don’t flash it – cash or stash it, in case a rainy day comes along

We’ve won the bingo, in the transfer window

Cause our best players say they want to go away

Not because of football, just for your info

Cause they care less about their playing than their pay

Lallana, Lovren, Chambers, don’t be strangers, so long

Why, hello Alderweireld, Tadic, Clyne, we’ll do just fine

We’re in the money, and ain’t it funny

They said that we would struggle but instead we’ve proved them wrong

They said that we would struggle but instead we’ve proved them wrong

original song and music by Harry Warren and Al Dubin (“The Gold Diggers’ Song (We’re in the Money)”)