MO2H 1: Transfer News and the Season So Far

After a long hiatus…we’re back! But now we’re podcasting:

Or download it here. (Follow the link, then right-click and save)

In Episode 1 we discuss the season so far as well as players and managers who are on the move.

We’re already working on Episode 2 but would love your questions, opinions and predictions – please leave a comment on this post.

And did I mention it’s a singalong football podcast? Click on “Continue Reading” for the lyrics in order to join in with the songs.

“Bad Buys”

We could have been anything that we wanted to be

With all the talent we had

No doubt about it, we were on top of the rest

Now we’re the best at being bad buys

My ego’s bruised and sore

My commiserations, no-one rates you any more

Bad buys, playing like we’re cursed

Once we were the best but now they say that we’re the worst

We’re overrated, and our fees weren’t worthwhile

Bad buys who’ve just gone out of style

Fernando Torres, I was worth £50 mil

Before the goals all dried up

At Liverpool I scored, but now there’s naught on the board

And Chelsea feel like they’ve been sold a pup

Eric Lamela, priced at £30 mil

That was in my last sale

I don’t get picked, now I only get stick

Spurs really mis-spent the cash from Bale

Andy Carroll, in my Newcastle days

I was always heading ’em in

But at the Anfield environment, I was surplus to requirements

I was sold – chucked in the bargain bin

We could have been anything that we wanted to be

With all the talent we had

No doubt about it, we were on top of the rest

Now we’re the best at being bad buys

You can send us out on loan, but we’ll still come back to you

We’ll be remembered for our fees and not what we say or do

original song and music by Paul Williams (“Bad Guys”)

“No More Managing Magpies”

If you could see the things I’ve seen

When I managed Magpies

All the fans just jeer and boo

I got stick from the players too

There was nothing I could do

When I managed Magpies

The fans would shout, “Give us a wave!”

And if I did, they’d act outraged

It was lose-lose at St James

When I managed Magpies

In my profession I’ve worked hard

But it’s time to stop

I’ll go down south, down in the league

And further from the top

There’s a Palace, fit for a queen

Yes Selhurst Park’s much more my scene

I’ll trade eighth place for eighteenth

Now I’m managing Eagles

No more managing Magpies

No more managing Magpies

original song and music by Fred Cliff, Harry Gifford and George Formby (“When I’m Cleaning Windows”)

“In the Premier League”

The pitches are always greener

In the Spanish Copa del Rey

You dream about being signed there

But that would be a terrible play

Just look at the teams around you

From the Emirates [Arsenal] to Turf Moor [Burnley]

Such wonderful players surround you

So what if you could earn more?

In the Premier League

In the Premier League

Life here’s a chuckle, you can make a bundle

From Sky TV

What have they got – better quality?

We’ve got Alan Shearer’s punditry(!)

We’ve got it all; we invented football

In the Premier League

The Eagles [Crystal Palace], they soar; the Tigers [Hull City], they roar

The Gunners [Arsenal], they fire; Sky Blue [Man City] thinkers inspire

Red Devils [Man United] aren’t bad but the Reds [Liverpool] are all sad

They don’t win like they think they should

The Black Cats [Sunderland] have luck; the Toffees [Everton] don’t suck

The Saints [Southampton] on the march; Blues [Chelsea] have an oligarch

The Hammers [West Ham] all pound, the Hoops [QPR] roll around

The same London neighbourhood

The Villains [Aston Villa], they thieve – Magpies [Newcastle] too, we believe

The Baggies [West Brom] say “boing!”, which is kind of annoying

Potters [Stoke] use clay, and you know they say

They all play long ball quite good

Foxes [Leicester] are sly, Swans [Swansea] go swimming by

Clarets [Burnley] decanted leave fans enchanted

Spurs [Spurs] spur themselves on, they’d like to have gone

To the Champions League if they could

In the Premier League

In the Premier League

Life here’s superior, you’ll be in the media

On Sky or BT

Everyone’s got opinions and hashtags

You could even marry a WAG

Life here’s fulfilling, you can make a killing

Life here’s a racket, you can still make a packet

Life here’s so brilliant, you can still make a million

In the Premier League

original song and music by Alan Menken and Howard Ashman (“Under the Sea”)