What It Means to Protect Without Controlling

I used to think protecting meant controlling.

Control the schedule.

Control the behavior.

Control the outcome.

But the more I tried to control… the more it backfired.

The more he resisted.

The more I saw fear masquerading as defiance.

And I had to ask: Is my protection about his safety — or my comfort?

What I’ve learned is that true protection is often invisible.

It’s listening first.

It’s anticipating triggers without overreacting.

It’s letting go of battles that don’t matter — so you can show up for the ones that do.

God doesn’t force us into obedience.

He invites us into relationship.

That’s the model.

Protection isn’t about power — it’s about peace.

It’s about creating a space where a child can be fully themselves… and still fully safe.

That kind of protection?

It changes everything.