245 | The Hidden Truth About Infidelity: Why It’s Never Really About You (And What It Actually Reveals)
- Author
- Todd Creager
- Published
- Mon 18 Aug 2025
- Episode Link
- None
Todd's sharing a conversation that could completely change how you think about betrayal and recovery.
He recently interviewed Lora Cheadle, a betrayal recovery coach and attorney who discovered her husband's 15-year affair. What drew him to Lora is that she speaks from a deeper place about infidelity—challenging the rigid ideas that keep people stuck rather than helping them heal.
Here's what we explore together:
Why betrayal uncovers hidden truths about how we've been "performing" in life instead of expressing our authentic selves—and why this awareness is crucial for genuine healing
The game-changing shift from asking "Why did this happen to me?" to "What is this here to awaken in me?"—this single question can transform your entire recovery journey
Why infidelity was never about you but rather your partner's maladaptive coping mechanism, and how understanding this frees you from false responsibility and shame
The difference between being victimized (which absolutely happened) and staying stuck in the victim role—plus how to write a completely different narrative for your life
How betrayal can break generational patterns and help you become truly "self-possessed" instead of seeking external validation
Lora and I are very like-minded in our approach. We're not minimizing the real pain of betrayal—Lora herself was on the floor sobbing for weeks. But we're showing you there's a path through this that leads to genuine empowerment and self-discovery.
As Lora powerfully shared: "You were victimized—that's a fact. But being a victim is a role, and you can play that role until you're 80 years old. I get one life to live here, and I'm living it from an empowered place."
If you're struggling with infidelity or know someone who is, this episode offers a compassionate, no-shame approach to healing that integrates mind, body, and spirit.
Connect with Lora Cheadle:
Website: https://loracheadle.com/
Free Resource: https://lorachead
Check out my complete program "From Bickering & Escalating to Connecting & Loving" for more in-depth guidance: https://www.toddcreagertraining.com/loving-connecting-masterclass
If this episode resonates with you, please share it with someone who could benefit and leave a review. Your support helps us reach more couples who are ready to transform their lives.
Check out my complete program "From Bickering & Escalating to Connecting & Loving" for more in-depth guidance: https://www.toddcreagertraining.com/loving-connecting-masterclass
Todd Creager, LCSW, LMFT
Todd is a sex expert and therapist in Huntington Beach. He provides relationship coaching to couples throughout the world and in Orange County including Irvine, Newport Beach, Corona del Mar, Laguna Beach, Seal Beach and Long Beach. (714) 848-2288.
You can find more tips and resources from Todd Creager at: https://toddcreager.com
HELPFUL LINKS:
- Get your FREE copy of Healing Infidelity From The Inside Out https://www.toddcreagertraining.com/heal-infidelity
- Secrets to a Sexy Marriage: https://toddcreager.kartra.com/page/sexy-marriage-secrets
- 7 Ways to Divorce Proof Your Marriage: https://toddcreager.kartra.com/page/optin-DPYM ...
