20 Powerful Questions That Shape Your Success (and Failure)

As a parent, teacher, coach, manager, mentor, leader, and human being - you need to know that the words you use and the questions you ask yourself and others makes ALL the difference.

Here are 10 Disempowering Questions and 10 Empowering Questions you should know about and insert or delete from your communication.

1. Do you understand? – (Yes/No answer, doesn’t check actual comprehension.)
2. Why don’t you get this? – (Blames the learner instead of guiding them.)
3. What’s wrong with you? – (Shames the person rather than supporting growth.)
4. Haven’t I already explained this? – (Dismisses the need for further clarification.)
5. Why are you struggling so much? – (Focuses on the problem, not the solution.)
6. Do you even care about this? – (Questions motivation instead of inspiring it.)
7. Why can’t you be more like [someone else]? – (This creates comparison and discouragement.)
8. Are you sure you can handle this? – (Implies doubt about their capability.)
9. What made you mess this up? – (Focuses on failure rather than improvement.)
10. Is that really the best you can do? – (Undermines effort instead of encouraging progress.)

1. What’s one key takeaway from this? – (Encourages reflection and comprehension.)
2. How would you explain this concept in your own words? – (Checks true understanding.)
3. What’s working well for you so far? – (Build confidence by focusing on strengths.)
4. What’s one thing you could do differently next time? – (Encourages learning from experience.)
5. How do you see yourself applying this in real life? – (Connects learning to action.)
6. What support or resources would help you succeed? – (Promotes problem-solving and self-advocacy.)
7. What’s an example from your own experience that relates to this? – (This makes learning personal and relevant.)
8. If there were no limitations, what would you try? – (Encourages creative thinking and risk-taking.)
9. What’s the next step you can take to improve? – (Keeps the focus on progress.)
10. What did you learn about yourself in this process? – (Encourages self-awareness and growth.)

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