Kagro in the Morning - February 12, 2025

IYL to KITM, YK but David Waldman only has two hours, weekdays, to tell you. Somedays, like today, Greg Dworkin shows up to assist via his many helpful interruptions.

Democrats will never bring a gun to a knife fight. They won’t bring a knife to a knife fight. They bring Robert’s Rules of Order to a knife fight. Dodgy Doges performing illegal acts on government property? What do you want Dems to do? Walk by a guard? No! Effective procedure is far too complex for that. Think of the trouble it would cause if Jasmine Crockett were to actually break Nancy Mace’s nose! No one wants trouble, no matter how good that trouble might be. 

After all, we have the Constitution. They are still letting us have the rule of law (as of 2:10 PM EST) Yep, just wait for things to turn out right… Also, Gops seem to be morons, so there’s always some hope there. (Remember to NOT follow anyone on the NOT-Z site! They are always available elsewhere!)

Then there’s that DODGY, and its most Artful DOGEr, Elon Musk. Elon, wearing his son Mxyzptlk, was forced to call his worst employee onto the oval carpet yesterday. Donald was asleep at the job again, and worse couldn’t perform the simple task of lying to credulous access stenographers about why DODGY exists, which is of course to destroy Elon’s enemies, including all the poors, (Because hilarious!) leaving the remainder… the folks that get it.

New York Mayor Eric Adams gets it. But if it turns out he hasn’t, back into the box he goes. By the way, how did the Pope ever get the impression that JD Vance worshiped Christ?

Sunday’s Superbowl halftime show was the second most watched TV show of all time but may have taken the lead in the number of stupid people watching it. That is, stupid people and old white folks whose kids obviously didn’t them bring up right. Here today to guide us is KITM Senior Hip-Hop Correspondent and Cultural Zeitgeist Analyst Darwin Darko who personally recorded a quick 10-minute primer to catch us up.