008_The Seventh of "7 Ways to Take a Deep Breath": You Are Enough

Have you ever felt like there wasn't room for you in your life? 

Let's take a deep breath and look at the seventh of seven ways..... Oh (inhale...exhale....), that feels better..... 

Thank you for joining us for the seventh of “7 Ways to Take a Deep Breath”. We'll take a step back:  You are Enough.

There is an idea in the wisdom traditions of India. It is found in Mahayana Buddhist philosophy.   It was taught by the historic Gautama Buddha himself. It is part of the Vedic tradition, and the Rig-Veda, that early Sanskrit text I work on from 1500 BCE.  It goes back into Indo-Iranian tradition, of about 5000 BCE, and probably back to the domestication of horses in about 10,000 BCE among what we call the peoples of Indo-European tradition.  I expect that it comes into this old wisdom tradition from ancient times when people understood that we, as humans, are part of a natural world. 

The idea:  You Are Enough.   

You are enough in the way that any sunrise is a perfect sunrise, and any plant is a perfect plant. 

We don't look at a mountain and say, “Our east coast Canadian mountains, they're old:  they are rounder in their shoulders. They are not like the mountains on the west coast of Canada:  they are young, and tall and spikey”.

A mountain is a mountain.  The mountain does not apologize for being a mountain.   It does not try to hide or make itself smaller so that other people, or other mountains, will feel more comfortable.  

Every sunrise is a perfect sunrise. The sound that a pebble makes when it drops in the stream is the perfect sound of a pebble as it drops in the stream. It is inherently enough.

A Tibetan expression that names this would be rendered in English as "primordial purity".  You Are Enough.  You are good, in a way that is so far beyond any kind of a distinction between good or bad, and this since the time before time.

In the way that oxygen is good, in the way that gravity is fundamentally good:  You Are Enough.

In our suggestions of seven ways to take a deep breath, what is the seventh suggestion? Let's step back, and take a deep breath.

What we have here is a menu of suggestions of ways that we can begin to deepen and strengthen the connection that we have with ourselves, and the connection that we have with others, in order that we will grow to find more meaningful ways to better contribute to our world. It's about deeply nourishing ourselves and one another, so that we are better able to give as part of the whole.

Let's look at the menu. Is there something here which feels like it might be helpful for you? 

Then, let's just take another step back.  I bet there's something that's not on the menu which really is what is better for you. Take a deep breath. Maybe you want to have a keyboard, a pencil or pen in hand. Let's just take a pause. What do you most need to increase the sense of relaxation and space in your life? 

Are you finding yourself in an intimate personal, or some other kind of relationship, which isn't what you need in your life?  Do you need to think about re-defining, or re-negotiating, or just simply stepping out of that relationship?

How about your housing situation? Is that working well for you? 

Do you have a circle of friends that are behaving in a way which is helping you to discover the best part of yourself?  Are the friends that you're spending time with drawing out qualities and aspects of yourself that leave you feeling - well? -  you can do better? 

What do you actually need in order to increase the space that you offer yourself to more deeply discover the selves that we are constantly in the process of becoming?   Let's name that. 

If you need to reach out and find some resources in order to be able to identify and then act on that, please check out the Resources page of justbreathyouareenough.com.   There are also other ways that you could reach out and find the resources that you need; if you listen to yourself, you know what they are. 

First, do that.  Then, when that has been given the space it needs, maybe you will find it useful to come back and look at our menu.

For students who are working with me on campus, when we have about three months together, my warm suggestion is:  why not pick something off the menu and try that? 

Once you've done what you most need to do first, then pick something off the menu, and try that for a month. See how that goes.

If that's useful and helpful for you, you might wish to continue that while you are trying something else off the menu that you think might be helpful or useful for you.

By the time our semester together is finished, you might have tried three of these things.  

You can check in with yourself and ask:  is this increasing my delight in being alive and my ability to discover who I am as a person?  If yes, please consider continuing.

For people who are with me for two semesters in a same year – over a period of six months - well, they'd be able to go through six items off our menu. 

Try it. See if it's useful for you. Then, if it's useful, please do that.

It may be helpful for you to put in place supports to help to sustain you through this experience of deepening your relationship with yourself.  You could set reminders in your phone.  You could book appointments with yourself even right now....

What were those items on our menu? 

First, we could figure out what we most need and then do that. 

If we're ready, the menu items that we saw in items one through six of seven ways to take a deep breath were as follows.  

First, meet with yourself. 

Second,  track your finances, and explore the possibility that discipline brings joy.

Third,  find a professional mind or body care person, like a massage therapist, or some other professional who will support you in the process of coming home to yourself.  Work with someone who is a good fit for you, who can witness your journey and help you to increase the alignment that you experience between mind and heart, body and spirit. 

Fourth, relax with yourself in a spirit of play. What kind of activity can you bring into your life, just because it is fun! Is it yoga? Is it tai chi? Is it playing a musical instrument?  It is “playing” inside competitive sport?  One day, I really will take those kayaking lessons.  What can you do to increase your ability to listen to your body's own inner wisdom by giving it space inside a spirit of play?

Fifth: gratitude practice. Heighten our awareness of what we already have, and grow in our appreciation of that, as part of our process of being able to receive and also to give.

Finally, sixth: enjoy food with a friend.

The space that you need is there for you all the time.  To remember what that feels like, take a deep breath.

The quality of the relationship that you have with the outside world directly relates to the quality of relationship you have with yourself.  For a free list of the full menu of “7 Ways to Take a Deep Breath”, come see us at “justbreatheyouareenough.com”. 

I'm Adela, and you've been listening to Just Breathe....You Are Enough™.  You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. If you haven't yet, please subscribe, rate and review this podcast. Join us next time, and thank you for listening.

Copyright © 2018, Adela Sandness