How to Build Values Based Connections with Your Teen

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Your Teen WANTS You To Connect with Them

This might come as a shock to you, but your teen WANTS you to connect with them. 

I know what you might be thinking, "Not MY teen. They want nothing to do with me."

I know, it probably seems that way, but I promise you, your teen wants connection. 

Your teen wants to belong. 

They want to be praised and appreciated. 

The want the safety that comes with unconditional love, acceptance, and belonging. 

Wanting to belong is a fundamental human need and desire. 

When this need isn't met, teens will desperately search for it. 

Your teen might not be willing to admit it, but secretly they WANT connection with YOU!

Your Teen Wants YOU To Connect with Them

Now, here's the tricky part. 

Your teen wants YOU to connect with them. 

Stop waiting for them to open up and start connecting with you, they want you to initiate the connection. 

This is powerful knowledge. 

Knowing that Your teen WANTS connection, and knowing that they want YOU to connect with them gives you incredible power. 

Whether or not it's true is less important than simply believing and trusting that it is true. 

Think about it. 

The thought, "My teen wants nothing to do with me." 

How does that feel for you?

It might feel "true," but it probably feels sad and disheartening. 

Now think about this instead, "My teen wants ME to connect with them?"

How does that feel?

For me, it's hopeful and empowering. 

It helps me know that what I'm doing as a dad, even though it's sometimes hard, is exactly what my teens secretly want. 

Build Values Based Connections with Your Teen

One of the things that I am fighting against in the world is over-complication or parenting. 

We have a natural tendency to overly complicate things, especially parenting.

So, here are some simple principles to help you build values based connections with your teens. 

When you join my membership in 2023, you'll get access to my full values trainings, which are AMAZING!

But for now, I promise you this is enough to get you started. 

1. Know your own values. 
   • Know what drives you. 
   • Know what your priorities are. 
   • Look to your results for evidence as to what your values are. 
2. Know your teen's values.
   • Understand what drives your teen. 
   • What are their priorities?
   • Look at their results for evidence of what their values are. 
3. Highlight your common values.
   • We all have common values. 
   • Most people focus on their differences. 
   • When you focus on others' values, you will appreciate them and have a desire to connect with them.
   • When you focus on common values, it builds a solid foundation for connection. 
4. Take interest in what your teen is interested in. 
   • Observe what your teen in interested in. 
   • Take interest in things that they are interested in. 
5. Trust the human need for connection. 
   • Seriously, trust this need. 
   • Our desire for connection causes people to do crazy things. 
   • When you seek to connect with your teen it will first change YOU and se

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