Thanos My Dating Life

This week, Danielle and Laura are spiraling (lovingly) about how they wish dating in 2025 had a Thanos snap—one snap, and the worst matches disappear into dust. Clean. Efficient. Emotionally responsible.

Also: Walton Goggins’ chains. They’ve got us in a spiritual chokehold and we’re not fighting it. At this point, we’d follow that man into a desert cult with no questions asked.

And finally, the cold hard truth—celebrities do not date civilians. We unpack the 3%