EP 234.5: How Are You Really? The Question That Breaks Through Eating Disorder Denial + Why Your Brain Believes the Lies⛓️‍💥

"I'm fine." "I don't have a problem." "Everyone else is overreacting." Sound familiar? If people around you are expressing concern about your relationship with food but you genuinely feel okay, this episode is essential listening.

Recovery coach Lindsey Nichol gets raw about the difference between denial and anosognosia—and why your malnourished brain might literally be unable to recognize the problem. She shares her own story of feeling "on top of the world" while struggling with anorexia, and introduces one powerful question that can break through the fog of eating disorder denial.

This episode is for you if:

• Others say you have a problem but you feel fine


• You're questioning whether you're "sick enough"


• You feel like you just have more willpower than others


• You're confused about whether your eating patterns are normal


• You've been told you need help but don't understand why

What You'll Discover

✨ The difference between denial and anosognosia (and why it matters for your recovery)

✨ Why malnourishment literally impairs your ability to recognize disordered eating patterns

✨ Lindsey's personal story: How she felt superior and in control while her body was failing

✨ The science behind eating disorder awareness and brain function

✨ One crucial question that can shatter the illusion and start your healing journey

✨ How to tell if your eating patterns are actually normal or adopted behaviors

Understanding Eating Disorder Denial
Anosognosia vs. Denial

Anosognosia: "Without knowledge" - physiological brain damage that creates complete unawareness of the problem. You literally cannot perceive your disordered behaviors.

Denial: Knowing you have a problem but refusing to address it. Using defense mechanisms to avoid facing the truth.

Signs Your Brain Might Be Lying to You

• Feeling "on top of the world" while restricting food


• Superiority complex about your "willpower"


• Believing everyone else is jealous or crazy


• Wearing restrictive eating like a "badge of honor"


• Feeling energized despite severe calorie restriction


• Complete confusion when others express concern

Lindsey's Personal Story

"When I was struggling with anorexia, I felt like I was on top of the world. I had this superiority complex, like everyone else was just jealous that they didn't have the willpower that I had. The more I restricted, the more satisfaction I achieved and the more in control I felt."

The One Question That Changes Everything

"How are you? No, but how are you REALLY?"

Why This Question Works

• Challenges automatic "I'm fine" responses


• Forces honest self-assessment


• Breaks through subconscious denial


• Reveals underlying unsureness and hesitancy

How to Use This Question

1. Sit with yourself honestly - don't give the surface-level answer


2. Challenge your patterns - are these behaviors you've always had or recently adopted?


3. Listen to trusted voices - if people you love are concerned, investigate why


4. Assess your daily reality - survival mode isn't the same as thriving

Red Flags to Consider

🚩 Constantly telling yourself you don't need to eat

🚩 Never feeling hungry (when you used to)

🚩 Bargaining and finding ways to restrict

🚩 Terror of weight gain controlling decisions

🚩 Rigid food rules that feel like "identity"

🚩 Behaviors that started as dieting but intensified

Powerful Moments from This Episode

"That voice is not you. With a healthy brain, you can assume positive intent from your internal voice. When you have a malnourished brain, it's important to challenge your mind with every tiny little thing."

"You can't change something you can't name. You can't change patterns and behaviors that you can't accept are patterns and behaviors."

"You are not a failure for getting help and support. The only way you fail is if you quit."

Your Next Steps
If You Recognize Yourself in This Episode:

1. Answer the question honestly: How are you really?


2. Look at your patterns: Are these normal behaviors or adopted restrictions?


3. Listen to loved ones: If trusted people are concerned, investigate their perspective


4. Seek professional support: You don't have to figure this out alone

Ready for Support?

📧 Email Lindsey: [email protected] 

🌐 Apply for Recovery Coaching: www.herbestself.co 

💕 Join the Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 

Limited spots available for fall coaching - only 2 slots remaining

Key Takeaways

💡 Malnourishment literally impairs your ability to recognize eating disorder symptoms

💡 "I'm fine" often masks underlying confusion and unsureness

💡 Eating disorders progress gradually - you didn't wake up sick overnight

💡 Trusted voices matter - if loved ones are concerned, listen

💡 Awareness is the first step - you can't change what you won't acknowledge

If this episode helped you recognize patterns you hadn't seen before, please leave a 5-star rating and review. Your support helps more women break through denial and find the help they deserve.