Paper Towels

As the universe erodes into entropy, humankind instinctively tantrums against nature’s inevitable transition into chaos. We like order. Whether it’s arbitrarily graphing the elements of the universe in a periodic table, or tidying up our living room, we like to put things in their proper place. Cleaning, though, is often a messy endeavor. Dusting, polishing, spilling, and absorbing need rags. Rags get messy and they have to be laundered, creating an endless cycle of cleaning. But lo, in our maniacal quest to end untidiness, we have created Paper Towels. Now spills can be sopped up and go directly into the trash! No more cycle! We simply shred some trees to make single-use, non-recyclable rags and throw the trees directly into the landfills while wasting energy and oil on creating each one just to stop this tiny inconvenience of washing rags! Thus bringing order into our kitchens, and, oops, expedited entropy onto our world.







*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.







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