The Friendship that Navigated a Falling-Out with a Mutual Friend (Kat)

After going through a friendship breakup, Shasta faced a dilemma: how would she navigate this with their mutual friends, and how much was she going to pull them into the drama? In this episode, she sits down with her friend Kat, who still maintains her own relationship with Shasta’s ex-friend. They shed insight on how they’ve been able to discuss the friendship breakup without being catty or ruining Kat’s own friendship. Shasta opens up about seeing an ex-friend move on, and shares how to deal with jealousy or pain when your mutual friends spend time with them. Finally, they reflect on how to choose the best response and minimize the fallout after a friendship breakup, and if there’s ever a case when you should expect your mutual friends to choose sides.

In this episode, Shasta and Kat answer the questions:

• How do you navigate talking about the falling-out, whether you’re the one going through the friendship breakup or you’re the mutual friend?
• How does it feel to be the person navigating a friendship breakup when other people are involved? How does it feel to be the mutual friend of two people who’ve ended their friendship?
• Is it possible and okay for your mutual friends to maintain their relationships with your ex-friend? Is there ever a reason your mutual friends should not remain friends with someone you’ve had a falling-out with?
• If your mutuals stay friends with your ex-friend, how do you deal with the pain or jealousy?

Connect with other listeners on our Mighty Networks community!

Join Shasta’s mailing list to be the first to know about upcoming episodes, friendship coaching, trips, and more: https://www.shastanelson.com/mailing-list. 

Resource Links:

• Watch the “Surviving a Friendship Breakup” series
• J. S. Park’s book on grief: As Long As You Need: Permission to Grieve
• Shasta’s books on belongingness and human connection:
  • Friendships Don’t Just Happen!: The Guide to Creating a Meaningful Circle of GirlFriends
  • Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
  • The Business of Friendship: Making the Most of Our Relationships Where We Spend Most of Our Time

Connect with Shasta on her other platforms:

Shasta on Instagram

Shasta on YouTube

Shasta on Facebook

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