Special 05: Marriage As A Cultural Norm

“Marriage may need a reboot for a modern world, and I would say it needs a reboot for the Black American community, too." - Joyice

Intro:

Let’s explore how the resurgence of marriage as a cultural norm has shaped my thinking lately!

Join me as I discuss four transformative events that collided to give rise to examining marriage through this lens. Through my recent research project on Black marriage, revisiting the book The Making of Biblical Womanhood, scripting our marriage preparation mini-series, and conversations from my recent Caribbean travels, I've gained new insights on this topic that I want to share with you.

This special episode also features a segment where I answer three questions from listeners regarding marriage structures, male leadership, and the relationship domains discussed in previous episodes. Please join me, and remember - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth for the next Secret Story episode!

Time Stamps:

[2:25] - Exploring marriage as a cultural norm has become a focal point for me lately.

[4:07] - I emphasize education and community support for lasting impact in healing relationships between Black men and women.

[6:52] - The first event was my latest research project.

[8:33] - I emphasize marriage's value in the Black community.

[10:22] - Single fathers are often overlooked, but I see you!

[13:44] - The second event was my re-read of The Making of Biblical Womanhood.

[14:39] - I challenge traditional Western and Christian patriarchy in marriage.

[17:01] - Dr. Barr's position on male headship and leadership.

[20:04] - I question male hierarchy.

[22:36] - I ponder an undeniable order in parenting without rigid gender roles.

[25:08] - The third event was the feedback on this very mini-series!

[27:34] - I refer to “the rift” between Black women and men.

[30:42] - The mismatched messaging within the Black community.

[33:42] -Boys and girls should receive complementary messages about values and traditions they are expected to carry into adulthood.

[35:33] - I mention Kerry Washington's position on naming and identity as an example of women responding positively to a patriarchal tradition.

[38:45] - Men's desire for women's companionship without commitment prompts me to contemplate societal shifts and perspectives.

[40:59] - I answer a listener’s question regarding three marital structures.

[42:34] - I urge Black women to discern between Western/Christian and Pastoral Patriarchy in relationships.

[44:58] - I answer a listener’s questions about leadership within marital structures, specifically in the Black Christian community.

[48:12] - In considering submission, I explore a man's responsibility to uphold quality in his household.

[49:26] - I answer a listener’s questions about using the term “relationship domains.”

[50:33] - I conclude with an excerpt from a book titled Marriage in Black.

Connect with Me:

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Links & Literature Mentioned:

Marriage as a Cultural Norm Blog Post {+ Episode Guide}
Marital Submission Blog Post {+ Episode Guide}
The Making of Biblical Womanhood by Beth Allison Barr
Thicker Than Water by Kerry Washington
Marriage in Black by Katrina Bell McDonald & Caitlin Cross-Barnet