#1271 - The Power of Teaching Kids About Emotions

I'll Do Better Tomorrow: The Power of Teaching Kids About Emotions
Kids don’t magically learn emotional regulation—they need to be taught.
In this special Friday episode of I’ll Do Better Tomorrow, Justin and Kylie reflect on a big week: a powerful email from the past, and a meaningful family conversation about emotions. They share how their weekly “teaching tradition” helps their kids understand, express, and manage big feelings—with practical ideas any parent can try at home.

KEY POINTS

• Weekly family tradition:
  The Coulsons have moved from monthly “tricky topic” chats to weekly conversations—because consistency matters more than perfection.
• Understanding emotions visually:
  Emotions were mapped across two axes—energy (high/low) and pleasantness (pleasant/unpleasant)—to help kids name and normalise feelings.
• Teaching emotional regulation:
  Emotions aren’t who we are; they’re what we feel. Kids were taught to “move through” emotions rather than get stuck in them.
• Adaptive vs maladaptive coping:
  Adaptive strategies included movement, music, cold water, connection, and even cleaning. Maladaptive strategies included isolation, outbursts, or ruminating alone.
• Explicit teaching works:
  Kids responded well to a clear, hands-on conversation. And yes—one child acted it all out in real time.
  
  

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE

“Emotions are not who we are—they're something we move through.”

RESOURCES MENTIONED

• The Parenting Revolution – Book by Dr Justin Coulson
• happyfamilies.com.au – resources for family connection
• Consent education: Consent Can't Wait campaign

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS

1. Start a Weekly Chat Tradition
   Choose a consistent time (e.g. Sunday evenings) to talk about a value, life skill, or tricky topic as a family.
2. Teach Emotions in Two Dimensions
   Use energy (high/low) and pleasantness (pleasant/unpleasant) to help kids map their feelings more clearly.
3. Help Kids Reframe Their Language
   Instead of “I am angry,” encourage “I have anger.” It promotes healthier emotional distance.
4. Create an Adaptive Coping List Together
   Brainstorm ways to manage big feelings that work for your family: music, exercise, pets, hugs, laughter.
5. Be Consistent, Not Perfect It’s not about grand lessons—it’s about regular, intentional connection that grows with your children.

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