🛰️ Thai Me Up, Vote Me Down, Launch Me Sideways (8/9)

This is Doomscroll.fm, broadcasting from the smoldering heap where ceasefires go to die and political memory has the lifespan of a fruit fly.

Top stories today include the Thai-Cambodian death flirtation now upgraded to full military cosplay, complete with vintage border disputes and anti-China whispers just loud enough for Uncle Sam to hear. Taiwan’s political purge feels less like democracy and more like app uninstallation, while Trump skips the US for Scotland because nothing screams “patriot” like fleeing overseas to applaud Brexit again.

Meanwhile, the DOJ pretends it just ran into Ghislaine Maxwell at brunch, Gaza gets squeezed into another humanitarian headline nobody reads, and Microsoft gives away Windows again like it’s still 2012. Also: dating apps still suck, teenagers are getting deported for talking back, and Elon’s orbital vending machines hiccuped hard enough to remind us all that space isn't a place, it's a service outage.

And just when you thought the simulation couldn’t buffer any slower—GPT-5 quietly dropped a whole set of new tricks while everyone was arguing about cartoon presidents on South Park.

No gods, no mods, just algorithms and regret.

Welcome back to the static.

🛰️ doomscroll.fm