Redneck Vampires Are Rising Up In The South

On the Show Today:









* 🚨 Masturbators on every corner! Tim’s Citizen app is blowing up with indecent exposures, naked CVS dancers, and mid-intersection jack-offs. It’s like Pokémon Go, but for perverts.







* 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 He wanted a Labubu plush. She wanted it up her butt. A beautifully stupid incest porn negotiation unfolds—truly the most disturbing Pokémon trade ever.







* 🦇 Redneck vampires rise! A Hello Kitty-wearing TikTok granny claims her toothless husband is kin to the Twilight clan. Yes, there’s bloodlust—and dentures.







* 📸 Caught with your pants down? A man sues Google after Street View exposes his bare ass to the world. Spoiler: He wins big.







* 👖 Sydney Sweeney is under fire for an American Eagle jeans ad. Tim investigates: eugenics or just good denim marketing? The real crime might be her whispery, NPR voiceover.







* 🇫🇮 Sponsored by Satan’s Porthole! Tim attempts to roast Finland and nearly dies trying to pronounce their language. National dish? Reindeer. National pastime? Saunas and sorrow.









Also:









* A testosterone-fueled parking lot meltdown ends in bollard carnage and shattered dreams.







* A listener loses trust in Siri, gets anime recs, and nearly calls their boss instead of the voicemail line.







* Meade Skelton claims he’s not deformed—just flabby in all the wrong places (and proud of it).

















🎧 Sponsor: Big thanks to DV listener Satan’s Porthole for supporting today’s show and requesting a roast of Finland. This one’s for you and your sauna-loving, reindeer-eating compatriots.







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Today’s Sponsor:









Promo Code: FREAK Save 50% + Free Shipping And Gifts | Coupon Code “FREAK” at checkout! Adam&Eve













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