Jhana or Frustration? The Choice Is Yours | The Sangha US #19 | 1.7.22

Jhana or frustration? The choice is yours.

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What do the numbers in the title mean? The number by the name of the student indicates the total amount of recorded calls with Dhammarato. The date in the title indicates the date the call was recorded.

0:00:00 - Timestamps start at 1 hour and 23 minutes

1:23:00 - What’s the tiniest, subtlest 0.01% better you can make this moment with practically no effort, by thinking a thought that is barely wholesome (but more wholesome than what came before)? Anti-perfectionism measure: it’s still more wholesome.

1:28:00 - You’re already ok with it, you’re just afraid of not being ok with it in the next moment.

1:30:00 - Notice that you’re enjoying the self-pity of being miserable and appreciate the perverse pleasure that it’s giving you instead of rejecting yourself for finding enjoyment in it (at least you’re enjoying something! Notice that!)

1:32:00 - It’s like you’re training in a sport and the coach is saying “you just need to run” and you’re saying “nah, i’ll just walk”

1:34:30 - If you are upset that you are failing, ask yourself: is it ok that you’re a failure? And if the answer’s “no it’s not”, well then let it be ok that you’re a failure, you’re working so darn hard to prove it to yourself after all.

1:38:00 - When we discuss your problems, we’re not talking about your mind (you’re not a special snowflake with unique problems), we’re talking about the human mind.

1:43:50 - Don’t use perfectionism as an excuse to stunt your progress

1:48:45 - Notice, when you’re thinking unwholesome thoughts, that you’re continuously referring back to the past or future e.g. “i did it, i just took a breath, i just gladdened my mind just now” ← but notice how that’s still just going back into the past again!

1:50:00 - Notice, when you’re thinking unwholesome thoughts, that you’re continuously wanting something.

1:51:00 - Try to stop practicing all day and just do 10-20 minutes first thing in the morning instead, using the rest of your day as a kind of ‘recovery time’/’rest break’ from your little daily ‘workout’.

1:54:00 - I was frustrated in the past and I’ll be frustrated again, but right now, everything’s ok (because it can be).

1:55:00 - Have a “problem” with procrastination? Try: nevermind, i’ll frustrate later.

1:56:30 - Your concern for the past hinges on your obsession with the future - consider if you’re so worried about the past because you’re worried the future will always be the (unwholesome) way that the now is. It’s just as important to let go of the future as the past, and to help you do this: notice that it never turns out the way you expect it to.

1:58:00 - It’s ok to be doubtful bc you have been doubtful SO many times (and look you’re still alive and well) so it’s just an “old familiar part of the family” [“hello doubt, my OLD friend, I don’t have to get rid of you or be angry about you, I can enjoy you too”]

1:59:00 - How frustrated can I get and still enjoy it?

1:59:30 - Q: But I feel like I can't enjoy the breath the way I want to. A: Ah, the way you want to - stop trying to enjoy the breath the way you did before or idealize as doing again, enjoy it the way it is just right here and now. That’s what satisfaction is [Satisfaction doesn’t necessarily need to be perfect happiness, it can be as unexalted as ok-ness with frustration/doubt/dukkha if you lower your standards enough (also, you can reclaim your power by noticing that those standards are your own)].

2:05:00 - Reframe your bad habits as tools/training wheels that you’re using now to seclude yourself from the hindrances. Healthy examples of seclusion training wheels: relaxing music, cleaning, cooking, being creative, journaling.