69: What Does Real Recovery Look Like?

Are you truly in recovery, or are you just performing? This week Luke welcomes Alana Gordon to the podcast (LMFT, co-owner and founder of Choose, and president of APSATS). Together they explore the difference between surface-level recovery and authentic transformation in this no-holds-barred conversation. 

They reveal the green flags and red flags that separate real healing from going through the motions—and why the work you resist most might be exactly what you need.

Listen to learn:

• The difference between "being in recovery" vs. "working recovery"

• Red flags like selective effort and performing only under pressure

• Green flag behaviors that show authentic recovery progress

Chapters

• 01:05 Introducing Alana

• 04:53 Honesty in Recovery

• 15:38 Sobriety and Accountability

• 18:53 Selective Effort

• 24:46 Performing Under Pressure

• 30:53 The Power of Personal Power

Register Now!

• Unmasked: Path to Authentic Masculinity⁠⁠ is a four-day in-person experience designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on September 16th-19th. Learn more and register⁠ ⁠HERE⁠⁠.

• Worthy By Design Women’s Retreat - This four-day retreat is for women ready to reconnect with their authentic selves and step into their unique design. Experience Human Design exploration, somatic healing, breathwork, sound baths, and sisterhood in the stunning Utah mountains. Perfect for any and all women seeking renewal, clarity, and joy. Retreat is September 14th-17th in Mapleton, UT. 

• Courage to Thrive - This intensive brings together expert trauma specialists in the serene Utah mountains for a transformative experience that goes beyond healing—it's about getting your power back. Join other courageous women October 14-17, 2025, and leave with proven strategies, unshakeable boundaries, and renewed hope…because your story doesn't end with betrayal—it transforms into something powerful.

• We don’t want finances to get in the way of your healing. Scholarships and payment plans are available for all of our intensives. Learn more and see if you qualify.

Connect With Us:

• Learn more about Luke here. 

• Schedule a complimentary consultation here.

• Don’t miss an episode! Join our email list and get notified when new episodes air! 

• Follow us on Instagram @choose_recovery_services   

Wanting more? Choose Recovery Services offers many courses specifically for men:

• Beyond the Facade: Men’s Healing Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with others, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deeper sense of self respect.

• Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. 

Additional Resources from Choose Recovery Services:

• Intensives - Accelerate your healing journey with one of our intensives, available year-round for individuals, couples, and professionals. Our intensives foster connection with others who share similar experiences, creating an immersive environment that enables profound transformation in a short period of time.

• Road to Recovery Webinar - Join us on the second Sunday of each month for a FREE interactive discussion that explores tools and strategies to support individuals and couples navigating the challenges of recovery following betrayal. 

• Choose To Be Podcast - This podcast focuses on helping women heal from infidelity and betrayal trauma.

• Healing Hearts - This is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy. 

• Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. 

Learn more and register for courses at chooserecoveryservices.com