Absolutely Not, Darling
Daily doses of life advice from your favourite disaster gay uncle. Sebastian Sterling, a 38-year-old British former West End dancer, delivers harsh truths wrapped in humor and genuine care. New episodes every morning at 7 AM GMT. Submit your questions at loudandfound.com/sebastian
- Update frequency
- every day
- Average duration
- 8 minutes
- Episodes
- 16
- Years Active
- 2025
#16 He Proposed in His Sleep with a Haribo Ring
A listener is 'engaged' to her sleep-talking boyfriend via a Haribo ring. Sebastian advises on the morning-after panic and how to broach this sticky subject. This podcast is a work of fiction. Submit…
00:08:00 |
Sun 29 Jun 2025
#15 Paralysed by the Pressure of a 'Perfect' Sunday?
Feeling more panic than peace from the 'Sunday Reset' trend? Sebastian helps a listener break free from the tyranny of the to-do list and find a kinder way to recharge. This podcast is a work of fict…
00:08:00 |
Sat 28 Jun 2025
#14 Failing the Gender Test You Didn't Know You Were Taking?
What if you don't feel 'non-binary enough'? Sebastian tackles imposter syndrome and the myth that there's a correct way to express your gender. Spoiler: there isn't one. This podcast is a work of fic…
00:08:00 |
Fri 27 Jun 2025
#13 When Your Wardrobe is a Shrine to Your Failures
Feeling suffocated by a wardrobe full of un-lived lives? Sebastian helps a listener ditch the ghosts of who she thought she should be, and embrace the woman she is—even if she only wears three black …
00:08:00 |
Thu 26 Jun 2025
#12 When Self-Improvement Turns You Into a Sociopath
Your quest for self-improvement has turned you into a joyless robot who terrifies themself in the mirror. Sebastian helps a listener who has optimised their life into misery learn how to ditch the ma…
00:08:00 |
Wed 25 Jun 2025
#11 My Uncle Claims My Cat Lacks Mental Capacity
A listener is the executor for a cat's £250k fortune, and the family is furious. How do you fend off lawsuits and loan requests aimed at a Persian cat? Sebastian offers advice on setting firm boundar…
00:08:00 |
Tue 24 Jun 2025
#10 My Promotion Is a High-Paying, Soul-Crushing Lie
A listener's promotion has a bigger paycheque but no job. Sebastian helps figure out if this corporate nonsense is a gift or a trap. This podcast is a work of fiction. Submit questions at loudandfoun…
00:08:00 |
Mon 23 Jun 2025
#9 He's Practising His Breakup Lines... On a Fictional Character
A listener finds her boyfriend's dramatic breakup notes, but they're for a character in his favourite video game. Is he a harmless nerd or is this a major red flag? Sebastian helps figure out if it's…
00:08:00 |
Mon 23 Jun 2025
#8 Resigning as the Unqualified Office Therapist
Eleanor's desk has become a therapy couch for her colleagues, and she's ready to resign. Sebastian offers a masterclass in setting firm but kind boundaries to reclaim your time and sanity. Time to fi…
00:08:00 |
Sun 22 Jun 2025
#7 I'm Your Mate, Not Your Personal Gay Cliché
When well-meaning support turns you into a walking cliché. After coming out, Luke's mates treat him as their personal queer consultant. Sebastian advises on how to gently remind them you're still a f…
00:08:00 |
Sun 22 Jun 2025
#6 Mourning a Life That's Taking Up All Your Wardrobe Space
Isla's walk-in wardrobe is a shrine to a woman who doesn't exist: a high-flying CEO. Sebastian helps her exorcise this power-dressing ghost and find peace with the life (and jumpers) she actually has…
00:08:00 |
Sun 22 Jun 2025
#5 My Manifesting Mantras Have Become Unhinged
A listener's quest to manifest a design career has gone awry, with his affirmations turning into unhinged threats. Sebastian unpacks the tyranny of toxic positivity and offers a gentler path to succe…
00:08:00 |
Sun 22 Jun 2025
#4 When You're Asked to Fund Your Brother's 'Dreams'
Your brother is 'finding himself' in Asia on the Bank of Mum and Dad, while you save for a house. Now they want you to fund his new camera? Absolutely not, darling. Sebastian advises on how to say no…
00:08:00 |
Sun 22 Jun 2025
#3 Out of Sight, Out of Mind, and Out of a Promotion?
You're working from home, but it feels more like you've been forgotten. Sebastian helps a listener who's losing out to her hybrid colleagues. It's time to reclaim your career, darling, without sacrif…
00:08:00 |
Sun 22 Jun 2025
#2 'Too Dramatic' or Is Her Fiancé Just Biphobic?
This week, a listener is left out of her sister's wedding, blamed for being 'too dramatic'. Sebastian suspects something more unsavoury is afoot – namely, a biphobic fiancé. Time to pop the champagne…
00:08:00 |
Sun 22 Jun 2025
#1 Your Friend Got a Mortgage and You Got... Existential Dread?
Feeling left behind after another Sunday scroll-a-thon? Leo from Manchester is watching friends buy houses while he feels stagnant. Sebastian pours the tea on the perils of comparison and why your pe…
00:08:00 |
Sat 21 Jun 2025
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